being a boy-ish... trying to be a boy - ish guy

Hii space hey people! Today I'm gonna try to be a cute boy ish boy. Sort of... one of the good things to having a big brother is that i can secretly go to his wardrobe! I felt a bit nervous but it was really fun. 

Sooooooo this is our first picture!! first of all, it felt so odd to try and start posing in 'boyish' ways or masculine... but it's not like it was bad!! lol, it felt so fun doing all of this cuz it was like a whole experiment. 

forgive my ...uhh... hair... NOT GONNA DELVE INTO THAT BUT YEAH!! here's the next set of photo dumps ~✩⋆｡°

😭trying to do poses with these clothes is a bit tricky... they're kind of WAY too big for me, i could barely keep these pants up with the belt... so each time I walked around I felt like they were gonna drop down to the floor. The coat covered all of my hands entirely if I didn't do any poses, and the shirt was equally as big.. so these hands in pockets pictures might be awkward since I didn't feel where i was supposed to put my hands at since I didn't register the pants being lower 

Also this one pose where guys buck their hips forward and lean their back behind is something I really wanted to try!! as seen above... people say that apparently that's a very manly pose so I wanted to try it or something lol 

doing the 'manspread' was also kind of a must!!! lol... i find doing 'manly' poses so funny

so here are these rings! it was kinda hard to do the peace sign like this because these rings are way too big for me but i still tried to manage to keep them on !! yay!! ... i feel like i should think more about accessories in clothes...

Soo yeah!! I have to say, that felt very thrilling. Mostly because of the fact that if someone caught me while doing this they would wonder LOTS of things or if it was my brother maybe he'd beat my ass for using his clothes but whatever... yay!! I mean, it also felt thrilling and very fun in the way that it's like, I'm breaking a boundary, I'm dressing myself in something I'm 'supposed not to', breaking a barrier.

But it feels freeing. It also makes me feel lots better about myself! I am once more reassuring my identity by breaking the expected gender stereotypes and also healing and trying new styles which is SO much fun! I'll try to look out for more cute boy's clothes, even though I think most of the mainstream men's clothing section IS kinda boring... I think this outfit was more normal-ish in terms of boys things but I think my aim in boy's style will be cute boy forever. 

Here's some extra photos!! mostly done for the fun lol 

That's all from me!! ... once again, sorry if my hair seems a little crazy. I was trying to do the most with what I have and that could really range from myself looking like a joke to at least having some form of ambiguity. BUT I am stepping into the concept that does encapsulate my whole complex self as I imagine, so it's a form of self expression that feels healthy and good to me wooo!!!

gift and final photo; I wonder how I look right here? I tried to do my best with my hair. But as always, I feel like short cute boyish hairs will always go better with waves or curls for me... but some guys do look so great and amazing with straight hair too, so I tried to give it my own boyish spin? Or maybe just style. 

Bye bye! I hope I don't look too manic♡

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ますます焼ける胸に

込み上げる I don't wanna cry♡♡♡