𓈒⠀ㅤ︶︶⠀BLOG NO.2 : VALENTINES DATE <33

!!!!!!!!!! NOT A FALSE ALARM GUYS !!!!!!!!! i went on a date with a beautiful girl and NO it wasnt my delusions we've met like 3 times before but thats a story for another date.

okay, so the story is that on 1/25 , the girl i was lowk crushing on and asking if i was delusional about, said she wanted me to be her valentine. she doesnt really like confessing to people so i was like OH MY GOD I DIDNT EXPECT THIS. but yes i accepted so damn fast and we talked abt a lottt

and sometime after i figured out she wanted carnations , specifically pink which is her favorite color. and let me tell u i got totally bitched by like 3 websites before i found one for her!! like srsly delivery tax vs the last 40 in my wallet is NOT a good pair.

but i got them GODDAMNIT!!!! ignore how they look a lil wilted, i asked a subreddit and they were like pre-blooming then! they got brighter but the focus was always the carnations . had to keep them in dim light / in shadow to keep it fresh after it came a day late (supposed to come on Wednesday, came Thursday, date was saturday) :) 

on the actual day of valentines day, we played a roblox game as ryuusae (who is LITERALLY us but we r lesbians btw like theyre us fr) and heres a screenshot frm that!!! 

sighhhhhhhh our coquette ryuusae avatars are so cute... shes a lot better at roblox at me, i get motion sick after a while -- and i feel bad for leaving but my stomach rlly does start to turn so bad bc of all the movement. also bc im so bad at the game she was like "its like leading a kid around" which i wanted to object that i was actually more of a dog if anything BUT then i realized it means i hve to lock tf in the next time we play <33 for her 

she also said she liked this notebook design so i screenshotted it to craft for her later.... im thinking the main strawberries r felt and the other strawberries are cut and paste with the white dots..... hmmmmm..... or i can buy something that looks like it.

and now, onto the ACTUAL DATE. let it be known that i adore this girl frm the bottom of my weird little heart. though ive always had trouble talking to people, being with her is so effortless it makes me smile. i love how her voice sounds nd the little mannerisms in her speech that match her texts, i love how like composed nd mature she is. its like everything she does is super cool, and i cant help but stare. i think shes so so so cute , and even when she says "my hair looks bad" all i can see is her stunning cute face and im like What whhatttttttt. FAWK! plus her outfit was sooo cute, she had on a valentines day dress and legwarmers and a little jacket with hearts on the side but i could tell she did her hair nd everything LORDD.

i was nervous at first to the point i watched lesbian yt vids on what to do, but in the end, it was so casual and relaxed, yknow?

my parents needed to drive me (which is embarrasing im fixing that THIS summer omg my mom has to drive me to dates. i know im not 18 yet but jeez i could at least know how to drive. ive been behind the wheel once and i nudged NUDGED!!!! a curb) so she met my mom and dad though they didnt get out the car. ym dad was lowk awkward and i wanted to hit him but she was right there so i restrained myself.

she got my MOM flowers too (；′⌒`) shesSO SO SWEET IT MAKES MY HEAD POP. i got flowers , chocolates , and a hello kitty bag -- and i gave her the boquet but its NOT enough anymore i need to give her one million gifts but im fucking BROKE GODDAMNIT . AND SHE GIFTED ME MORE NITRO FOR MY SUBSCRIPTION I NEEEEDDD TO MAKE HER STUFF.

so we went in, and we ordered frm the bakery. their stuff is soooo cute and cheap 

we both got donuts mine was chocolate and hers was strawberry, and she got a matcha peach something boba -- while i got an apple juice cause there was no sprite. and then we went to eat our stuff upstairs!

the donuts were more bread-y with a bunch of frosting on the top & the boba ws lackluster to her , but the tart was good! we talked for a while and this lolita facebook group whichwas SO cute btw. came in as we left to walk to the walmart beside it

it was SOOOO cold out there but it was worth it bc i used it as an excuse to hold her hands when we were inside. u heard it right guys we HELD HANDS and everything as we walked through the aisles to look at the stuff.

neither of us bought anything (though it was a Struggle not to do so) and considered walking to the barnes n noble next door. but the most important thing was that i remembered that i had to ask her to be my gf.

i wish i couldve done it better than like in a walmart bc i really did want it to be over cake. i might handwrite her a love letter and send it or like get something delivered to her with a real, loving confession on it. UURGHHHHHH i feel like the first date sets the tone, and she was so sweet and she rlly spoiled me but i didnt have enough to reciprocate that to her. i gave her one of my bracelets though.

when we got back to sweet hut, she bought more for her family and i offered to pay but she said it was okay, and then my parents came back so we had to part. i think we were outside when i left, nd we hugged per usual -- i didnt really want to go because genuinely being with her feels so nice mentally. like a hammer to my constant depression fog but how do i EXPRESS THAT IM A FUCKING FREAKKKK AND I CANT PUT THINGS INTO WORDS. and perhaps its too early for a love letter? but i need to give her something so bad im searching for one singular chance.

i Need her to know that i enjoythe time we spend together, and i love how forward she is. my princess cherrypie is just so wonderful i could scream into my pillow (i did actually) but how does one EXPRESS THIS.i will do anything to get the secrets of love pllllzzz make this last for YEARS . she makes me want to be better, do better, etc. i need to kick my brain into GEAR good grief 

as u can see it went So well and now shes my girlfriend and i love her so much i need it printed on a t-shirt.I NEEDDD TO YELL IT FROM THE ROOFTOPS. I NEED TO SCREAM ON MY FRONT PORCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!FAWKKKK

my girlfriend (e heheh a hahah MWAHAHAAAAA) <333  is the best ever btw. Bestest Ever Ever nd its not even about the stuff she got me its the fact that she just exists so perfectly its like i cant formulate real responses. HOORAYYYYYY