12-2-25, Wednesday

I woke up. I watched Moomin valley. I ate eggs, and went to school

Threw a pastry at Emo, speedran my lit homework, threw a muffin at Espurr.

During the break, I studied for AP Bio with Smart Man. Then I played harmonica, hiding in the stairwell.

My AP Bio quiz went well, Physics also went well. After school I walked my injured ass over to CVS to claim my free item - a fast food gummy kit for Splatoon Fella. During my time there I saw Fancy Guy, who spent an awkward amount of time talking to me, but it was all fun. He always dresses so nicely :]

Then I got driven home. I ate the filling of a couple meat sambusas, and a bit of smoked salmon. I got a fig candy, but I chose to save it to give someone else. 

Yesterday night I made the animal masks I'll make my friends decorate, and they turned out quite nicely! Tomorrow is career day, and I'll have to dress up nice. I want to talk to firefighters and other outdoors job people, maybe a farmer!

Scary refused to iron my coat, she said it's because I don't deserve it, and I don't need to look nice because we're in America. She then said I should do it myself, but I'm really worried that I'll ruin the coat or mess something up. That's okay though. I look nice every day anyway, and it reflects my various situations well. 

Splatoon man said she'll give me meat jerky and pistachios for Valentine's day!! Along with tea leaves :] I'm really excited, it sounds so delicious!!! I hope she likes the candy I got her. I was nervous listing my food preferences to her, but she seemed chill with it! I love being a bird man and I love my friends 🐦‍⬛

See you later! 

20:16

Later thoughts: I have to change the system.

My school does not allow me to wear my headphones during one class. They claim it's because i won't listen, or because other students will want to, or because I need to experience exposure therapy for my misophonia (that's not how it works!)

The day it happened, I went to every authority I know. My counselor is powerless, my 504 advisor is uneducated, my principal/vice principal are too focused on rules. My parents don't think they can do anything. They all got told I am rude and challenge authority - but I'm just trying to exist with my misophonia.

I had resorted to breaking down and crying every class. Intense, uncontrollable body ticks and twitches. Involuntary sounds as my chest tightens spontaneously. All class. The entire hour and twenty minutes, just sobbing. If they don't want to help me, they will have to see exactly what the consequences are.

But this isn't right. I shouldn't have to endure mental torture for some lousy health grade. The people that have this class after me shouldn't endure mental torture for some lousy health grade. My nervous system shouldn't be taking on even more than what my debilitating CPTSD brings along.

Here's the plan. I cry a couple more classes. I will tolerate one more week. I will collect evidence on how harmful this is to me, how much more disruptive it is, how inhumane their rules are. Then, I take the evidence to my 504 advisor. If she does not listen, I try the mercy of the principal. If that doesn't work, I'm filing a complaint to the big dogs. To the bigger 504 people. 

I'm not sure if I will have to get a misophonia diagnosis throughout this whole thing. My 504 advisor said it doesn't matter, because she's not allowing it. But it's clear that breaking down every class is disruptive enough, I don't think they need proof of that at all. But still, I'll work on it if I can. If i can't, fuck it, we ball. 

20:53.