Thinking

I've been thinking about coming out as transgender for a while now, but I'm really scared.

a.) My parents (as I've mentioned recently) and family are transpobic and homophobic.

b.) I can't transition (besides my name and pronouns) until I move out on my own. So that means I can't get T, a binder, or a haircut for a few years (37 months.)

c.) Considering how the government is and what they're doing, I'm really worried for my future (and trans ppl as a whole). I'm scared that by the time I'm out of my house and by myself, I won't have the recources to fully transition.

I've been feeling dysphoric about EVERYTHING lately, even how I hold myself/stand in public. I seriously hate this. 

So, the most I can do right now is come out to my friends, change my name, and change my pronouns. I guess I can discretely start wearing more baggier clothing (even more than I already do), but I dunno.

I'll keep updating you people. Though I know no one actually really cares, but it helps to type/write out my feelings because I don't have access to therapy.