eat less, do less; eat more, do more

I went out to eat lunch with a friend recently. He made a comment about how the meal he ordered was big and that it was (too) filling in the context of Raising Cane's/fast food proportions. Mine was okay.

He followed up with asking me whether I ate enough each day. I said that the way I live lends itself to how much I eat. And, I elaborated by saying that because I don't really do much physically, I don't have that much of an appetite compared to when I used to walk to classes in university. Less activity -> less consumption -> less energy for activity -> loop.

I think sometimes about eating more to avoid getting really sleepy by like 4pm. Maybe having more energy would help. I also think about whether I'll gain weight because of it, because the most type of activity I do is mental. Having the energy to stay awake and continue thinking. I used to really be obsessed with my weight back in middle-high school. I am/was a skinny kid, and those insecurities/dysmorphia haven't necessarily left >_>. Not for mine own body.

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This brings to mind how eating disorder (online) communities are so off-putting. I wasn't a part of them, but I've unintentionally seen some conversations and discourse in those spaces. I'm a little relieved that I didn't spiral into the ways some of them view consumption and body image.