A stray cat's memoir on finding 𝐹𝑜𝓇𝑒𝓋𝑒𝓇 𓊆ྀི❤︎Valentine's Day Special❤︎𓊇ྀི

The streets are my home. I have nothing to lose because the only things I own are the whiskers on my cheeks and the fur on my back! Despite it always being cold, I find it comforting because that is my Forever! The collared cats laughed at me, shaking their heads, their voices dripping with pity. “That is not Forever,” they said. “ Forever is what we have.”

In search of this “Forever,” I set out on a journey with only the whiskers on my cheeks and the fur on my back. I wandered aimlessly, hiding beneath cars, digging through the garbage chute, and chasing down shadows in empty alleyways. But no matter how hard I looked, I could not find Forever. I was lost. 

And then you found me. 

The day we met, I scratched and hissed at you, just as I did with every stranger who got too close. I did not trust you one bit. But you laughed, finding my hostility to be an adorable act of defiance. You took me home with you that day. You washed me, cared for me, and pampered me with a love that I have never known before. Running your fingers through my tangled fur, you cradled me in warmth and said endearingly, “You are mine, as I am yours.”

Before I even realized it, you had completely disarmed me. The impenetrable fortress I had meticulously spent my entire life building crumbled—brick by brick—with just one look from your twinkling eyes. 

Sleeping on your lap, I lazily rest my head against you, lulled by the steady rhythm of your breathing. You tenderly stroke my head, brushing the hair away from my eyes with delicate hands. Blinking my drowsy eyelids, I look up at you and you’re looking back at me. You smile adoringly. My chest tightens. I have never felt safer before. Putting a collar on me like the other cats, I had finally found my Forever. How could I go back to the streets after this?

But then you cheated on me. 

Once a beloved pet, now a runaway cat. I wish I was unfound. I’d rather be a stray cat than a caged pet in an unloving home. 

I used to believe I had nothing to lose. I told myself that the only things I owned were the whiskers on my cheeks and the fur on my back. But I was wrong. I lost things I never even knew I could lose.

I’m sorry for being greedy. 

I don’t need to have Forever. 

I just thought, maybe, it was something I could receive too, like the other collared cats. 

I won’t ask for more. 

Now, when a stranger approaches, I do not scratch or hiss. I avoid. I turn away—not out of fear, but because I’d rather be unfound than have to find out again.

They say it is better to have loved and lost, but they never quite tell you how to live on with that loss. Especially when the one thing that you cherished did not quite cherish you in equal return. Especially when that one thing was your Forever.

I’m nobody’s person, just a person in everyone’s lives. Tell me, did you cry when I abandoned you at the subway station that fateful Sunday morning?

Back on the streets, I look for breadcrumbs and scraps in the alleyway.

Choosing a familiar hell over an unfamiliar heaven,

The streets are my Forever home.

𝐻𝒶𝓅𝓅𝓎 𝒱𝒶𝓁𝑒𝓃𝓉𝒾𝓃𝑒'𝓈 𝒟𝒶𝓎!
𝐿𝑜𝓋𝑒, 𝐸𝓁𝓁𝑒 ♥︎

Author’s Note:

In lieu of Valentine's day, I wanted to write a love poem (but typical of my writing style, it always has a dark undertone 💀😭). Hope you enjoyed reading, Happy Valentine's Day! Also, we’re in a cheating epidemic rn so BE CAREFUL everyone! Sorry for fear-mongering lmaooo. I really hope you cried while reading this LOL I was cackling in *evil* as I was typing this out. Can’t wait to buy all the discounted chocolates the day after Valentine’s LOLLL

Context:

Coming from a broken home, I never had the chance of experiencing “real” love. It was always a perverse version of what is supposed to be pure. Always conditional and twisted love, I seem to have a knack for attracting, not humans, but literal rodents. The one time I did experience something close to love, just like the cat in my story, I thought I had finally found my Forever. I thought it would finally be my turn, after a lifetime of seeing love come so easily to others. Well, he cheated on me 💀💀💀 LMAO. So yeah, I avoid people now. I’m just not interested in constantly losing people that I have finally found. The idea of finding love will forever be collecting dust on the backshelf of my mind. It’s not that I think I'm unloveable, it’s just that I think people are so hateful. I’m glad to say that I’ve tried tho. All I did was waste my time ngl but at least I can now give up with an ease of mind and conscience. I’ve been alone my entire life so this much I can endure, I suppose. Dis not even the hardest thing I had to endure in this lifetime anyways lmao 💀😭 I’m not forcing anything anymore, the right one will come at the right time.

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