Missing someone you love is so hard.

Me and my ex-girlfriend broke up a month ago, after we've been together for almost 2 months. It was my longest relationship and she taught me what real love is. She broke up with me because she said she needed space, and I believe her. I felt the same as she did at one point in our relationship and asked for a break aswell, and that break made me realize how much I actually love her. I'm offering her what she asked for, but it's so hard not reaching out. I wish I could text her and tell her how much I love her, ask her about her day, talk to her about anything, making plans together. I miss hanging out with her, I miss seeing her, her voice, her gaze, I miss holding hands and kissing in the park. I miss going to museums together. I miss eating out with her, I miss taking her to expensive restaurants out of my budget just to get her favorite foods, even if that meant I'd afford only food next month and not anything else. I miss making her gifts, I miss taking care of her, giving her massages, making her food when I couldn't take her out. She made every place in Bucharest so beautiful, now they are all a bittersweet memory, I'm happy when I remember, but I'm also so sad it's just a memory.

I've been listening to a lot of Avril Lavigne lately, for some reason the album "Let Go" reminds me of her, even though we've never listened to it together. I've been playing a lot of "our" songs aswell, I just miss her. I've been sleeping so much lately because I've been seeing her in my dreams and it just feels so nice, having her even if it's only in my dreams....

I wish I could tell her all that I'm saying here, but I don't want to disturb her peace.

A, if you ever see this, I really wish I could be your 9 again. I love you.