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Sometimes, I wish that I was a man.
(I don't mean this in the I feel like I'm in the wrong body or something)
I'm going to make a disclaimer that I'll talk about gender, because as a whole the concept of gender is very stupid but is still very present today and that's .......... yeah.
Why do I wish I was a man? Because then most of the culture would be bent to my favor. Then I'd be the one who'd get benefited and have the upper hand always. I wouldn't be at the short end of the stick ending up in bad situation in most scenarios. How did it even get to be like this? What was the origin... who even cares, why is it like this?? It's been like that forever anyway. Aren't we all the same stupid amount of flesh and all that regardless of sex or anything else.
It's obvious culture has always been that way, everything is always made to favor men, for their gaze. Then life becomes hard from that very point. And it's not like it only affects women, this keeps killing the same men and also making hardships for men who aren't traditionally masculine, because yes, the type of men that do get benefited are the masculine powering guys that get everything fitted to their gaze. I hate this. Why does everything have to be so sexual?? Why does a anime character need to have the camera shoved up her bust and thighs just because 'it's a little thing the public wants to see' UGH I hate it... it makes me feel so mad.
Because culture has been shaped in such a way, it's like the 'default' pronoun is 'he'. The default sex to think a animal is right away is a male. Some people can be like that, I used to be a victim of this, beacuse it's like everything is powered by men so of course they're gonna be the default.
I'll do another disclaimer I hope this doesn't sound like I hate masculine men and traditional masculine men or like... MEN in general. I just hate the specific type of men who gets masculinity in the wrong way and act out toxic beliefs because of that warped view of masculinity, the ones who sexualize and try to turn it in their favor... THOSE types of men who make things worse... uhh I hope the concept comes across clearly... it's obviously not all men like I love men but then there's SOME men...
Soo yeah now tackling the fact that these types of men are the ones who still are benefited from culture, it feels horrible to live as the other part that gets 'used'... it feels like all that's truly seen is like women are objects, and whenever they look too old or too weird men wanna change them. Because the culture has shaped women to be fit for the male gaze. And this even affects the same men because they get affected so horribly and treated so badly they keep bottling up their problems and emotions until that explodes and it results in something drastic like death.
Even the men are victims of their own system... then prejudices, stereotypes, and other things were built on top of that...
Traditional masculinity is so stupid because it's being done in the wrong way...
I can't feel safe. I stare out the balcony, at the starry sky at night, and the streets, and the park that lights up in a pretty way, and I wanna go out so badly. But I know I can't. I know that I'm vulnerable and I'm a target too from the second I leave home. In spaces where it's dark, and lonely, I feel insecure and watched. Outside.
And this is something that happens regardless if you present as man or woman, but since society has made women out to be 'helpless' then prejudices start from it and it's better to be safe than sorry so I can't go to the park on my own at night...
I should probably just buy a taser and stop yapping.
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Jegg
wait omg i dont say anything about it but I always get a slight ick whenever someone just defaults to using he/him pronouns for an inanimate object or an animal...but also im guilty of it and using she/her feels kinda weird too like i wish there was a gender neutral pronoun thats more commonplace so thats its a bit less awkward to use for other circumstances than referring to ppl. Like i think they/them is pretty integrated in ppl's minds when referring to ppl but aint nobody referring to a dog on the street as they like
but also "it" feels so mean to use...i mean ik some ppl use it for themselves as pronouns but ya
like am i supposed to just ignore that bc it suddenly ruined the show for me.
and the whole male gaze thing!! its so annoying bc all the hype shows I want to get into all progress really good and then suddenly just drops a pile of misogyny or fanservice and im like
and I totally get the rlly annoying type of masculine men. The specific stereotype of "masculine men" at my school are the type of boys who joke around ab being gay and say slurs and are for some reason obsessed w edgy WW2 jokes. like. omfg. i hope they stay unemployed forever bc i dont think they deserve income. they r actually sooo annoying and some of the most beta of the beta ppl I have ever met
and I HATEEE how mainstream stuff can never be 100% misogyny-free. Like theres always one joke or one part that just makes me go "oh..." even if the rest of the show is good...MANN...maybe im just too woke for these ppl brah. I am honestly just looking forward to becoming independent, making good income, and moving to a community w super nice friendly and not weird ppl to hang out and watch cool shows w in the future I HATE MEN!!! (the bad ones)
seriously... and it's sad because the patriarchy was the one who made using 'she' more awkward. Because it isn't the norm, it's just the other part. Like honestly I'm one of the persons that wouldn't mind it at all calling a dog 'they' because like... whatever. It's not like the dog minds, it's not that serious but using 'it' just sounds like they're not a living breathing being and that's not fair so like... they is a perfect way to call dogs you don't know the gender on?? I only say this because the 'calling everything you don't know it's sex 'him' by default' thing REALLY needs to go.
cuz like it's the same stupid view that's as old as time and honestly who other than the same weird men like it... like it's so sad. I recently learned about the ending of Wonder Egg Priority (a anime that they say is super bad) and basically the start of the anime had a super good buildup but they were getting burned up in middle of the production, and then the last episode they left it in hands of a misogynistic writer. (the plot of the story is the power imbalance between powerful adults and vulnerable teens and how adults take advantage of teens, so basically it's teen protagonists fighting adults in the form of 'demons' to save their friends who have been hurt by adults) and it looked like the plot was going to finish in saying that 'there is a power imbalance in society and adults need to act up to not hurt teens' but because this weird misogynistic writer took over he LITERALLY made the ending blame another teenage girl. Basically he said that the source of why teen girls are hurt and they end themselves is because of another vengeful teen girl which was hurt too and manifested teens to end themselves.
Like the male gaze it's just so everywhere that it's like it truthfully pushes us to hate men or something
WHAT sense do you find in that. WHAT.... Basically they blamed another girl... (maybe you already know all this if you did watch the series lol) but LIKE THAT'S THE MOST ?????????? LOGIC I'VE EVER SEEN?? of course since the writer is weird like that he says 'teenage girls are demons that keep luring poor adult men to them...' WHAT. WHAT.
It's just the whole warped view and how out of touch some men actually are with society because there's still men that go by the principle 'men are goal based and girls are emotions based' .............. ughhhhhhh. Like the impact patriarchy has had on the whole world is so massive it's just difficult to not see it anywhere, but I always try hard enough to remove myself away from misogynistic things and spaces and it sort of works... honestly I pray that you find a nice place as well, like it's not even us being woke, is just that these concepts and jokes are so outdated that they really need to pack it up.
OMG YES. YES. I Hate that exact type of guys. THEY BELIEVE THEY'RE SO EDGY AND HARD DEVIL.... Like they're that type of men who 'relate' to the guy from the american psycho movie. LIKE for some reason they HAVE to be obsessed with jtler and make jokes with every tragic accident that has happened on the history of the world... and they're the most obnoxious weird guys, like honestly they need to leave and retire somewhere else... but whatever.
YOU GET IT. YOU GET ITTTTTTTTTTTTTTT.... I just hate SOME MEN.
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francis, fran
i have nothing more to add. patriarchy is a massive scam. i wish i could at least tell you smthn about how it arose historically but as far as i know there's no good reason for patriarchy. the main theories are easily disproved... i will list out the two things i've heard and why i think they're invalid:
some say it's because men are physically stronger on average. but historically strength has never equaled social status; in fact, usually strength is associated with more menial jobs. positions of power like leadership roles usually lack physical strength. it would make more sense for societies to be led by slightly more females while slightly more males work lower class jobs.
men might be more aggressive on average, but women have also been shown to be more capable of cooperation and manipulation, making them better leaders and generals; despite this, we see fewer female-led societies and armies. aggression alone does not justify nor explain patriarchy.
to me, there is nothing about any of the basic differences of the sexes justifies or even explains patriarchy. maybe men have somehow evolved to cooperate in aggressive coalitions of boys, resulting in the crappy principles of masculinity. whatever the case, it's dumb and really old, and really absurdly common amongst different cultures around the world throughout history.
Yeah. It's just one big dumb scam to all parties; and just like you explained biological facts don't excuse the whole buildup of it. The origin is hard to track but the concept is that since ancient times societies have forced submission on women to be able to do it on other groups, and also there's the matters of sexuality, importance, and religion. Because as far as Christianity goes it paints like the women is an extension of the man; a bad, rotten part of 'him'.
It's so upsetting how it silently shows up in about everything. I see the most brainless arguments around on internet by men who have warped ideas of what being a man is because they have been fed a toxic image of it for their whole lives. The mistake is how boys and girls are raised; from there there's already a unnecessary weird gap. Just in these last 2 days I've seen the most sexist stuff said on the internet, there was this dude who said that men having a sense of fashion is 'gay' because fashion is seen as something girly and feminine so other men would assume it's 'gay' and that's the most baseless crazy thing I've heard, because the stereotypes have grown so wild that men taking regular care of themselves is seen as bad because it's girly.
He explained that men just prefer to be more simple and putting more effort into building a fashion sense is 'gay' if you're a man (wtf) this is literally surreal. THIS is the type of guys I'm talking about.
From clothes, to toys, to roles, to groups, everything got divided and different. Because the male gaze still affects the world today, why am I seeing crop tops made for 10 year old girls? As if female clothes weren't conditioned enough to be for a male gaze, why is society trying to make little girls dress up like women? I've literally seen this around so much, it's like they're skipping childhood and that's not mentally good.
It's obvious that everything is different and there's lots of exceptions but a man is inherently valuable because he is, but a woman isn't inherently valuable, her value stems of what others can give her. I had a little overview of 'The origins of patriarchy' by Gerda Lerner and it tries to explain to where patriarchy stems from initially. And 'The second sex' which explains the condition of the 'other' gender and how it's lived... I feel like both concepts grasp things so good; patriarchy is crazy omg
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