rot creeping up again

it has been 3 hrs since I woke up and I am so low energy suddenly I was trying to shower but I was just like auauoiahahah0oaoaauaiaghahghhgjo9990oo i love unnecessary hot shower that makes me slightly dizzy after I leave🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤

trying to stay positive is such a grind I just want to bedrot all day and never wake up after 27 hours of nonstop doomscrolling

the rot is calling me </3

but i have to peel off the rotting slime bits sticking onto my skin

i made myself a cup of coffee so I hope this makes me feel better...i dont even have a whole lot to do anyway i have one more college application to finish and then i have to debate whether I should do these 2 other schools...but honestly ive been so college app college app college app all winter break that I feel like if I let it go I will genuinely not know how to be productive

like honestly college app is kinda just bitch work like I go on reddit to research and throw up random words and then have grammarly proofread it 

I keep calling the time I spend to work on them "study sessions" but im not doing anyyyyy studying at all........................but i technically do have to....or do i?????? its like senior year i could give less fucks about my shitass science competitions stuff 

I wrote all over my college apps that i LOVEEE usabo and I love reading biology textbooks but no fucking way i am reading all of that shit again. I will throw up. 

and i hate all (most) of my club officers they dont do shit like some of them literally do nothing like can i fire them somehow is that a thing bc they actually fuel me w murderous tendencies <3 like its not even hard work how hard is it to fucking copy down ppl's names on a google doc r u serious. like one of them I see on valorant and marvel rivals 24/7. literally u r so unemployed and useless. LIKE JUST QUIT but obviously they wont bc they want to write they were treasurer in xyz science club🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺AAAUALIYHKJEBNKJLESGJH@#BEMNQSBMNBASKVBEJH<BWMNABJHAHAAJHGAHJGAJHAGHJA literally just 1 more year and im out. im gonna explode.

the stuff i say on spacehey make me sound like im a demon anger issue asylum bound guy wearing a straitjacket and you know whta!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!at this point that might become reality. jk. i am normal and i will manifest normalcy and employment in my life bc im soooo desperate to become a cogwheel of society wow!!O!I!U!OU!Ou!OU!OI!UOI!UIO!UOI!UIO! 

man fuck my tranny baka life brah im gonna drop out of college so i can focus on doomscrolling and mental health breaks bye