Another Rant: Male Loneliness

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The cure to the male loneliness epidemic— at least for like boys/men ages 14-22 — is to power through that little crush you developed on the one girl you've met that 'wasn't like the other girls' and 'didn't leave you like everyone else does'. I can almost guarantee you that she was also just looking for a friend and you voicing and feeling entitled to your attraction to her will not have the outcome you think it will. 

I made a friend last year and he lasted maybe a month because it was so obvious that he liked me and that he wanted me to like him back. He had no friends, he was new to all of his classes, he was really into nerd shit, and he was awkward as hell. It sounds like I'm dogging on him but he was actually really cool, as a friend. 

Then, because he thought he liked me due to our proximity to each other and I appeared to be the only other person of the opposite sex who would speak to him, he started telling me I wore too much makeup and that I should change this about my diet and this about how I dressed. All things to make me appeal more to his tastes that he didn't even realize he had because he didn't have a wide enough social circle to fully realize them. 

I stopped being friends with him because of that, it made me uncomfortable to have my lack of attraction so obviously disregarded and my own personal tastes so loudly criticized. 

I later found out that he made one more friend before meeting me, another girl in our class that I used to see him sit next to all the time. Turns out, he thought he liked her too and I guess he pushed it a little too far because he ended up sitting next to me. And so the cycle continued because he wasn't willing be patient and actually develop a friendship before misinterpreting our niceness as attraction. 

Not every friendship is built to blossom into something more and that's okay. Make your friends, bond over your interests, judge her taste in men, understand that you are not what she needs because you are not what she wants, and move on. You may have everything in common down to the birth mark but if she's not feeling you like that, don't twist and bend and contort yourself trying to appease her when she never asked you to. At the end of the day, you're debasing yourself trying to go after someone who doesn't want you so it's no wonder you end up lonely as a result. 

No matter how much she says 'I need to find a guy like you' or 'I wish every guy was like you'. Baby, she said like you for a reason. I won't hold your hand when I say this because I don't know you like that but, you cannot and should not force someone to like you in the way that you want if they weren't prepared to in the first place. No amount of bonding over nerd shit will change that. 

You might even think you're being slick trying to turn the tide and make yourself an option but I can almost guarantee you, you are not. And you can't resent people for how they feel. Especially because your horizons are so narrow and confined that you may not even actually like her, maybe when you develop more self confidence and a definite sense of your attraction you'll realize... this bitch can't dress, and her edges are crusty, matter fact, you've never seen her spell anything right— not even by mistake!

Maybe, she wears too much makeup and your interests don't really align outside your lego builds and animal facts. In fact, you're a devout Christian and she's quick to deny the existence of any god. You might think it's perfectly fine to call your friends slurs and use H*tler memes but she is absolutely appalled by the notion. Because, maybe, you were better off friends. Maybe you were never attracted to her in the first place and you were just lonely and ended up lonelier as a result. 

AND I DIDNT MENTION BUT HE WAS FRIENDS WITH A NEO-NAZI because all of his friends were maladjusted white boys on discord. He found the neo-socialist side of instagram some fucking how??? I'm not blaming that on loneliness that's just bad decision-making. 

TL;DR: Stay in the friend zone long enough to realize that you're only lonely because (in a lot of cases) you misinterpret platonic interactions as attraction. And don't fall for the indoctrination into right wing spaces because it makes you feel better about your own shortcomings by blaming all of the world's problems on minorities.