I like him

Date: 14 december 2024 

The guy whos lap I sat in I have started to develop feelings for. We hangout a lot and I almost never get tired of it. He's entertaining and fun as hell to be around. Yesterday him and two of our friends slept over at my place. Originally me and my crush were gonna sleep on separate sides of the sofa and the other two on the floor. But I went to his bed to test the waters on if he would firstly let me sit there when we watched a movie, then I tucked myself in there aswell, eventually he laid down behind me and sort of spooned me and so I decided that he prolly would allow me to sleep there. I was kinda worried on if I was just disturbing him cs I'm still not entirely sure on if he likes me. However he did lay his arm around me when I laid there and said I was his "snuff blanket", I woke up later in the night and his arm was still tightly wrapped around me. I wanted to know how he felt so badly that I decided I would try to grab his hand and see how he reacts, only problem is it was the middle of the night and it is entirely possible he was sleeping. I grabbed it and intertwined out fingers, he didn't really do anything, then his thumb moved slightly up against my hand but Idk if he did that in his sleep or if he was awake and did it. Either way I held his hand for a while cs it was warm and I was cold, but eventually I let go. We laid packed closely together the whole night and when we woke up we talked and he said he had woken up three times during the night. I wonder if any of those times was when I held his hand or if he didn't notice. When he said this he sort of looked at me intensely so it might mean he knows.

Now I'm tired as hell cs I did not get a lot of sleep. Also he asked if I wanted to have a movie marathon with the Lord of the Rings movies but Idk cs that's gonna take a lot of time. It was the first time that he said that just me and him should do something together without anyone else. I'm kinda nervous abt it. 

- Elliot