selfies + existential spiral

i got a new dress today. i feel pretty. ଘ(੭ˊᵕˋ)੭* ੈ✩‧₊

it's delicate and soft and a little big on me, but still cute. i feel so pretty...

i've been quite worried about my appearance for quite some time. i'm starting to come around to it again. i don't feel like i have that effortlessy pretty attribute i had back when i was 15 though. i hit the wall.......

recently, my life seemed to have shifted on it's axis. i have felt unable to do anything. like an archon has pitted a vendetta against me, and rolled the dice a nat20, everything in my life has been dragged into the nadir's crevice.

probably doesn't help that i've surrounded myself in my studies. when i reflect on the past, and into history, i feel small. i feel insignificant. i feel like a shellfish beneath the tide, like i am insignificant in the grand scheme of things. thousands of years of writing, spoken word, and history, has left us entirely without a trace to be documented in the modern day, and i just can't shake the feeling that that will be me too. the world is so old. i only exist for so long, what, 80 years if i get lucky, and don't die in a freak accident when i'm young?

what a scary thought to make the day feel encroaching.

hope you spacehey-ers are well. i looove u! 𓊆ྀི❤︎𓊇ྀི