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sometimes i mourn all of the time i've wasted.
almost like an entire life that could've been... made stillborn by my poor decisions.
videogames. youtube. internet.
hours sitting at bus stations or lying in grass. laying in bed doing nothing in particular except maybe resting. enjoying the moment.
jamming out to some really good music and not getting any work done.
i don't have any discipline now. i threw it away, if i ever had it. then i lived "okay" without it. now i need it and it's really hard to restrain myself.
i don't know how not to love wasting my time in idolatry.
love/hate/love///hate. ./ l o . ve /a jate ha e .a kv oelvoaihet ... ya feel???
and i mourn the time i've killed this way.
maybe i'll write a poem
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magilon
i think i understand this but in a slightly different way? i find myself looking at others pursuing things i never thought i could. i sometimes wonder where i would be had i picked up a passion and spent my days pursuing it rather than doing...well i'm not entirely sure what i was doing. i know i'm still young, but i can't help but wish i had done more with my life. it went from "i'm young i can do that when i'm older" to "i wish i had done this when i was younger." i can't change it. i know that, but i still am filled with some regret. i wish i had done more...
i find it a little ironic how i used to feel guilty for not giving enough attention to schoolwork. now i feel i've wasted so much of my time focusing too much on school. it didn't really get me anywhere in the end...
(thanks for being my introduction to spacehey btw).
interesting perspective... i constantly wish i did better things with myself. even if not school i still think i waste so much time because i live so idly. thanks for the comment, though
by francis soundworks; ; Report