Lectio - 9

Body is deforming into a weak, necrotic self of my individual.

May the earth devour my rottenness and make my eyes prevail, so turning them into blossoming lights will be the only beautiful thing from me.

The need for connect or maintain a significant human dynamic is getting tiresome, pointless, familiar sensations of alienation come across to me once again, such a fool I was, believing those fragments where sealed in a cellar door within the realms behind my mind.

Not a day passes without the feeling of dirt, shame, guilt sprouting all over again in every detail and pessimistic echo, in every word leaving my mouth, in every noise heard, in every sense, in every image seen.

Your narcissistics traits wont entangle me, I sincerely hope so. But starvation grows bigger, hypocrital had turned out to be my mind, hating the fact that nowadays, no soul seems to forget or move past over their haunted memories, but im currently swimming across the inversed river to not turn into another one.

Im losing and forgetting myself, can not feel the presence of a closer God. Im not deserving of faith, or help, at all, its acceptable for me to drown in this self-made lake of non-sensical pity.

Between the faceless silhouettes I see, ironically, its yours, the only one I could recognize, even in eternals iterations, may I never forget you. Faceless Girl.