Lamby is depresssd

probsies not actually but liek

i was at like

doctor appt right,, like psychiatry and whatnot,,

and the guy just went like 

'what you have might kinda sounds like depression'

in my mind,, i thought 2 myself

"HuH what???/" 

then after the appt i stumbled upon this blogpost abt how understimulation can look like depression 4 some ppl and i was like

""HUH""

so yah.

am i gonna trust some random post more than a doctor? idk. 

but yh. I'm gonna try 2 listen 2 podcasts more for in the background.

A lot of me doing nothing kinda stems from "idk how 2 start, confusion" and "anxious that outcome will not b up 2 what i want it 2 b"

apart from all that hopelessness shit,, it's that

so while i MAY (possibly) be depressed,, I still wanna do more shit which is not lying around and doing n0thing,, and realising that i may b in need of extra stimulation 2 start doin' things (like listening to things in background,, etc.)) helps a lot actually.

Hopefully I'll b able 2 be more.. "in",, yk? w/o hving 2 start medication again,, 'cause that'll b a whole Thing tht i'll hv 2 deal with.

2 b clear,, i'm not professionally diagnosed w anything like mentally,, i just hv appointments 'cause of brain illness. 

So yh. I'm mostly fine,, probsies.

Yh. I'm fine,, really. Just been feelin' a lil off,, but hopefully I'll be bale 2 slowly build back into actually...Being,, and existing normally, yk? Not just aimlessly wandering day after day.

ok bye bye that's all 4 now.