am i being used for my body/being taken for granted, or am i just misunderstanding them?

honestly this is just a rant/vent because i have noone to talk to

also there is hella typos that i rlly dont feel like fixing soooooo

some stuff i need to make clear to continue so its not super confusing, but i cant explain anything for shit so dont expect any of this to be crystal clear

i have little to no friends that i can genuinly talk to or be myself around. i have only two close friends that i frequently hangout with, or atleast used to frequently hangout with.

these two friends are both older than me, one being 19, and ill use the name fred for him, and the other being 17, ill call them chris

fred and chris knew eachother a little before meeting me, and they have been together for the whole time ive known them.

fred is a family friend of mine, ive known him for about a year and a hlaf now id say.

recently, fred has gone to college and me and chris have been stuck without him, which has been hard on the both of us but especially chris.

chris and i were never really the closest friends, but we were close

fred and i have been very close and open with eachother

chris, fred and i have an odd relationship some would say. we are in a poly relationship that is mostly open, but i more just kinda joined as they accepted me. 

now that ive got the basics explained, i can start to talk about the actual topic of this blog

me and fred have been very close, like i said, and we met when i was 14 and he was 18. fred has always been very open with me and honest, never really hiding how he felt or what he had to say. i found that charming almost, i had never expirienced a friend as openas he was, as i havent had a "real" friend in a very, very long time. i slowley started to develope a crush on fred, and it was quite obvious. i kept it from him for a long time, but eventually i did open up. he was accepting of it, though he stated he did NOT reciprocate the same feelings, as he was dating chris. time went on and over a month or two, i noticed that fred had started to subtly flirt with me, and being a very flirtacious person, i knew what he was doing. i played dumb through all of it, knowing full well that what he was doing was wrong for many reasons. and this went on for awhile, and i started to unconciously become emotionally attached to fred. i had a lot of issues with my father, so lacking a male figure in my life definetly played into this. as time went on, it was becoming more and more obvious that fred was into me sexually. he would play with the materiel of my pants on the side of my thigh when sitting with me while we hungout, and would fidget with the sleeve of my sweatshirt sometimes. i was, and still am i guess, into him that way too. we ended up having sex, then again, then again, and again, and so on. noone knew that we had this relationship and we never made it obvious. and just the beginning of this summer, fred, chris and i had a threesome. fred really only would genuinly be interested in me if it had something to do with sexual fantasies, sex, nudes, or anything of that nature. now that freds at college, i noticed that our relationship is starting ti diminish, drift almost. i really hate when i noticve these things because im never wrong. and i realized that there was almost a pattern to this. everytime we lack sexual connection, he stops reaching out as much, he stops wanting to talk, he doesnt snap me as much, and its justr a really obvious thing that happens. i dont know if its the lack of physical connection, or if its because he really only talks to me for my body and sexual obedience.

i messaged him asking him hen he would have the time to rlly sit down and talk with me, so im not just gatting lackluster responses every now and then. he responded with being unknowing of when he will have the time to talk like that. after complaining to me almost everyday about being bored, having nothing to do, and not having a lot of classes, thats the response i get.

i dont know if its because he lacks making time for me, or if he is genuinly busy.

ive always made time for him and i never once took the time we needed to have these conversations for granted. 

am i just being a needy asshole or is there something genuinly wrong????

side note, i know the age gap is rlly weird but we are going to put that aside for this blog.