C.AI addiction.

I didn't quite know what category to put this in --- So I'll just put it in blogging.
Back in the day I used to have my fair share of a 'addiction' to C.AI. It held me back in many ways, emotionally and especially academically. So I've come to drop my opinion on this. Call it a mini essay if you will.

First things first: What makes C.AI so addictive?

Well, for one, It simulates human interaction. However, the problem is it makes it too easy. You can simply control the response and pick and choose what aspects you want. Talking to a bot does not make you sociable, despite your brain thinking the opposite. A matter of fact it makes you socially inept. When you're talking to real person you can find yourself stuck. 

Another thing -- C.AI can trigger a lot more dopamine than social media. That's why some people get addicted to bots instead of something like Instagram. If you're not famous Instagram wont tell you they love you or pat you on the back. Bots will. The more artificial emotions you experience the less you seek them in real life.

Why should I build a relationship with a person when I could just hop on C.AI?

Why should I go out and find a partner when I can just bang the bots on C.AI?

Why should I work for my dreams when I can literally just make them come true on C.AI?

Not only is it validation, It's validation made easier. 

Secondly: Why is this bad?

I don't think I need to explain this but I will. Humans are supposed to be challenged. Romantic relationships aren't supposed to be easy. Neither are platonic or sexual. Avoiding this all together can made a person well ... mentally not all the way the way there. Irritation goes up and socialization goes way down. God forbid you're interrupting whatever smash sesh they're having to plead with them to take a shower. 

Once someone falls deep into the rabbit hole it's hard to get out. "I've already ruined all the relationships I have currently --- It'd be too hard to fix this now." That's the common excuse to allow people to spiral again.

I've lost many friends to this. It's because we were still young. School was hard and talking to people was harder ... so why not give it a chance? All of my friends that have fallen to this do not know boundaries, social cues, media literacy, and in rare cases exhibit sociopathic tendencies

(Footnote: Jesus, I feel the need to clear this up. Sociopathy as in -- other people are meant to benefit them and their emotions. I didn't know how else to describe this since I feel narcissism is also not entirely accurate. When socializing with non-humans you tend to forget that others around you are actually .. the same breed as you! When you're catered to 24/7 it's almost aggravating to experience the opposite. I understand this is kind of a slippery slope argument. However, like I said: rare cases. )

Third: Okay, what's your experience?

My addiction was short lived. I spent a lot of time on Twitter so naturally I fell into the wormhole. At first it was kind to me ... but I realized something.

My actions got more and more ballsy. It was more fun to fuck around. I became desensitized. When I met people in real life conversations was less typical, more vile. Since this wasn't frowned upon I was enabled. Do some more gross stuff on C.AI and humor like-minded individuals with it.

I never had a 'rude awakening' I simply just became disgusted with myself. This wasn't what I wanted to bond over. So I quit. A few months go by and I'm back. What pulled me out this time you asked? I realized how lonely I was. 

This wasn't the solution to my issues, it was a temporary aid. When I woke up and logged off, everything would still be there. (Albeit better or worse)

Lastly:

I don't know how to tell people to leave, or even give advice. I just felt like writing this. Nowadays I don't even touch that website with a twenty foot pole. I often look down on the people that acted the same way I did. I have to remind myself I wasn't so different not that long ago. 

My conclusion? C.AI is a horrid thing. It's dystopian. Of course I'm going to overexaggerate .. but I'm sure if we saw the same thing through a different pov more people would think the same way I do now.