I've never liked my birthday. It's always been bland and overrated and overwhelming. I dont like when people pay that much attention to me and waste their time for me. I was never good enough for that. When I was younger I'd pretend it was fine but it never was. I never liked it. I haven't had a party since I was 7 and I'm glad for that. Gifts are less frequent and never actually on that day, and I'm glad for that. I dont like knowing that somehow wasted their time and money for me. They probably don't care deep down. I'm not good enough to be cared for liked that. I'm a terrible person is what they tell me, and I believe it. I've never liked celebrations for me, they never end good. I've began to forget the day and I wish others would too. But I know they won't.

10/4/24
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