death. luck.

     i tend to contemplate a lot, death is something i should do more contemplating of. generally if i think about this question i end up just saying... actually i dont know what i say to that question. i think death is a concept used to give an answer to what happens after life. possibly something like that. but what really happens? is it even real? i tend to believe in the immortal soul theory, where i will forever be in existence, i have forever died trillions of times, i have been reborn trillions more. i have existed before i have existed after. 

i don't know if its objectively wrong to think that, but it just feels right. i just trust my gut.

another thing i think about alot is luck.  ive seen people try to Studie luck see if it exists. they said all luck breaks down to be is people who see, or people who dont. they did this by giving people a newspaper asked them to find something, the people who generally found themselves lucky found it, those who didnt were "unlucky". but that doesn't explain my luck with things unseen. in games i find rare objects that tend to be difficult to get (rare drop chances). and its not like its rigged, its a normal game drop. 

another event or just a gut feeling, when i was 11 i told my dad to buy a lottery ticket. i had never done that before, and he didn't really buy lottery tickets. he obliged and won 500$ off a single scratch off. that may not see like alot but at the time we were extremely poor. he blew it on cigarettes and Pepsi though.

ive only had one major injury and it was still minor, dislocated finger when i was 5. and to be honest i haven't been hurt majorly other than chronic migraines. 

idk what these thoughts mean. nor will it affect me. or how i feel just... thinking about it. and don't worry i wont ever harm myself to find out any of these theory's.

dont let my thoughts effect you either, infact i hope you enjoy reading it.

sincely, r