Life, Dead Birds On The Train, Cosmic Scream Essay

I don't know where to begin with this one. I suppose a small life update. Back to work, in every facet of life. Foster from Washed started staying at my place this weekend and it was his 22nd birthday. I hope he had fun. Tonight Kaden and Kiva are coming over too. They need to stay here for the week because Kaden's uncle fell through. They're most likely moving to Lake Arrowhead. Exciting for them. Glad to have such good friends. Took Foster to Angel's Tijuana Tacos for the first time and we drank at Little Joy. Always good to see everyone there again. Ran into Alonte, Marco, Candice, who else? Maybe that was all. We watched tombstone and had a blast. Doc Holliday is *literally* me guys, terminally ill and has a Hungarian wife. Nice to hang out with Foster, a dear friend of mine. 

I bought a cowboy hat, feel that era of my southern gothic life coming on. Trying to earn it by going to martial arts more. Going to double Muay Thai and Jiu Jitsu on Mondays in addition to going to either when I have time, but sometimes when I feel comfortable and hopefully have insurance I'll spar on Monday nights. It was good to be in Algernon's class. He remembered me. He asked where I was, which classes I was going to, I told him it was my birthday last week and I had been partying the whole week, and that I had been going to Coach Cortez and Rafa's classes. He wished me a happy belated birthday. Good teacher and kind man. Hope to land my schedule on his classes more.

Feels good to breathe out my nose, to be healthy finally. Sleeping for 12 hours because I haven't had REM sleep for a month because of my illness last month. Feel so much better now that I passed those two tumors. Maybe I'll post the photos of those wicked abortions next time. So many people take their health for granted. Very grateful to be healthy. Record prep is coming along. Interim tracks are coming along. Now I just need to finish the demos for a few of these songs.

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On the bus, I watched the lady play her little game.

All the little birds neatly in a row, so they can fly away together.

Then, the advertisement plays. 

She tries to close it to free the birds, but still it plays. 

It brings her joy to free the birds.

It occurs to me how sick the game is, that we're like those birds.

That's the joy, is freeing something, to give it the joy of freedom we wish we had. 

Fly, fly away,
little dead bird. 

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I've noticed this phenomena in zoomer music called the cosmic scream. I'll revisit this in an essay later. Today I am far too tired and now everyone is over.