life is honestly going pretty good (Christianity rant)

I recently went back to church and im so glad i did. 

i go to a new one now, after a few years of not going at all due to a situation that honestly kinda traumatized me.

but i feel like it was fate that the one time i come back to church against my will i actually ENJOY it! and i learned something from it. they were so kind and fun and they actually talked about something of substance that I could understand.

usually my church isn't full of people my age. and they blab about football or something when making refrences to a book i dont even read. i dont learn much, or understand much. i feel like im forced to be there a listen for the sake of being raised Christian. so i never wanted to go. 

but now..

this new church i go to talks about issues like money or mental health. and they address it. like ACTUALLY address it, and get deep into it without denying any of the ugly stuff. and the preacher talked about how depressed he felt and how terrible his life was, as he hadn't been a Christian at the time.

 it felt so raw. and real. to hear from some guy who had been punched in the face by life and ready to give up, not having a religion to rely on. and then he finds a preacher who helps him get on his feet and eventually lead to him becoming what the other preacher was to him. its so comforting..

and when he talked he made sense. he explained stuff. he made funny jokes but also he had this comforting and inspiring aura to him. and he ACTUALLY gave me reasons to stop drowning in his puddle of depression.

and a whole step-by-step guide on how to get out of a rut. it felt so real. and honest. and really touching. it was so weird that the first time i come back i actually enjoy it. and it held value to me.

and i love that the church felt like a family. not some forced "love my neighbor" stuff but REAL love. And cool events. and making sure we didnt feel obligated to give money or to take a sermon (however u spell it lol). just short and sweet lessons that tie to our REAL LIFE PROBLEMS!

i love that they took in people's problems and addressed them using the scripture. It made it feel more real. and although im still unsure of myself, i feel more connected to my religion now. and i want to go back instead of dreading it.

this is pretty out of context and weird but.. im really happy recently, unlike before. summer is always the hardest for me. and i actually DID something today.

my dad is much happier and I am much happier. he laughs more often. I dont know how this will play out but these day feel actually nice.

anywho.