reminder that i should be grateful for being alive

being alive is something you dont really pay attention to until youre really bad or even worse youre on your deathbed. i guess is so much easier to focus on other things instead. because being alive is something we take for granted. what really struck me and made me think about this was listening to this podcast. the story being told was about a young man that grew up in a very poor neighborhood, with little to almost no opportunities. grew up in a broken family, no dad and a drug addict mom. his passion was playing football, it was his way to escape this life, a life given to him not by choice. growing up in an environment like that can only do one thing: force yourself to do things you wouldn't even think of doing if you weren't there. so he started stealing, and hanging out with others kids like him. living a similar life. later as an adolescent in a fight with this mom, he decided he couldn't take it no more and chose to leave home so he started living in the streets alone. living in the streets must be a complete hell. i couldnt even picture myself being a situation like that.

well then as time passed, it was the time for him to enlist in the army. he saw the army as a way to get out of that life.  he had no doubt about it. he knew that if he made it right, he could get out with a bit of money, maybe even a job, and start a new life. what he didnt imagine though was he was being sent out to eradicate coca growing terrains. for no one is a secret that a drug landlord wont simply let go of the cow hes been milking millions of. theres no way they will. so what do they do? plant mines. a lot of them. so that no strangers get too close. theres a department in the army created for that. he was part of it now. sadly, this labour should be made only by professionals but living in a country filled with corruption like the one he lived in, relegating this to a simple "pedestrian" without enough training was becoming the norm. long story short, in one mission, he stepped in a mine and his lower body blew off. im losing a lot of details here, im not best at telling stories, but that one made me think that at any moment i could be gone. i might die. when you think about it, about all the plans you had about life, about having a family, taking care of your parents, buy a house, be happy... that all comes crashing down. because the only thing you need to die is to be alive