Sick.

Sometimes I wonder how sick I actually am.

I'm fine Physically, not underweight or overweight, no injuries, just a really weak immune system. 

I know that mentally I'm sick, very sick, so sick that my pills don't even work. I keep getting urges and thoughts but that's my fault for not speaking up, for not talking about what's really going on in my brain.

Maybe I would have been fine if I said something more than just "im sad", maybe I wouldn't be like this, this empty, this angry, this sorrowful.

They're probably right, I'm just a bad and spoiled child looking for attention. Who would want to help someone as rotten and disgusting, i certainly wouldn't.