authenticity IS vulnerability

I'm currently on a journey of learning how to be more likeable, or just generally less off-putting. People find my demeanor odd because I always wear a flat expression and have a "dead-sounding voice". For this reason, I began trying to change how how I come off, exaggerating my inflections and forcing smiles, but I think this may be even worse because other people can see how fake it is. 

I'm realizing that before other people start liking me I really have to like myself. My outlook on life is actually surprisingly positive, and there are many many things that make me happy. However, I don't show happiness in the same way that other people do, and I think people give up on me before realizing this-- or have a bad initial impression of me. I suppose I should stop caring about how other people think of or perceive me. Though I find it difficult when people say things about how I come off to my face. Surely I should think of some way to improve, but I'm thinking in circles here. 

I struggle to show vulnerability (the topic of my last post), and well, authenticity is a vulnerability when you don't like yourself. Or don't like things about yourself, like my own struggle to outwardly express emotions. To be more authentic I need to show more vulnerability, a vulnerability which makes me feel insecure about myself. People can see insecurity, and no matter what expression I wear They are going to see that, so I guess the only path is to learn to be okay with how I come off.

I'm not disappointed with my life or how I am, in fact, I'm happy. I think I'll only find that seeking other people's validation, interest, or even companionship to be completely unfulfilling. I am happy to be my dead-expressioned self. But I've always been such a people pleaser that I don't want to come off as rude or disinterested. I must accept that these are labels that are impossible to avoid as long as I'm trying to be authentically myself. 

I should probably see a therapist again sighhh