I HATE OIL

TW: ed

ok so, ive been fasting all day long. ive had worked out for hours, played sports and more. And at the end of the day i receive the news that my family -including myself- is going to eat steak with fries.

You may not know, but this dish requires oil, TONS OF OIL to be prepared. When i thought about it, i felt dizzy, sad, anxious. I almost cried in front of my family when we were eating.

Im really afraid of oil. anytime i eat something with it i cant help but feel so disgusting and guilty.

Im tired of living like this: fearing of food. but i prefer suffering from this paranoia to continue being fat. i dont want to weigh what "im supossed to". i hate my body, living in it. its hell

I hate being fat. it literally ruined my hole life