One of the strangest things I've experienced since finding the correct treatment has been hearing my own voice.
Not the sound produced by my vocal cords, but the expression of my identity.
When I look back through posts and replies I've written over the past couple of months, I can actually hear myself.
I can see myself.
Not what I think is polite.
Not an attempt to mimic the mannerisms of someone superior.
Not a confused and calculated performance.
Just me.
It's something I've always wanted, but never realized I didn't have.
"Be yourself," they say.
But what if your mind is too clouded to discern who that is?
For most of my life, my identity was eclipsed by anxiety.
But I'd never known anything else.
I'd only ever caught glimpses of the real me.
I tried many different treatments, multiple types of therapy, which I always took seriously.
Nothing made a significant difference until I began taking the correct ADHD medication.
What I'd really like to say, is how strange and wonderful it is to truly see yourself.
How much it matters for people to be able to access treatment.
And how worthwhile it is to hold on.
I hope you can take a moment to appreciate yourself just as you are, and recognize how far you've made it already.
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