6/16/2024- blog 6 Sunbaked Vanity

Morning entry:

I wish I hadn't stayed up to shower, I should have gone to bed earlier and done it in the morning.

I made my own account on our new coffee machine- It has a lot of settings and the images look similar and I accidentally made myself an espresso instead of a normal coffee. It was still quite good however.

It's a nice coffee machine, it grinds the beans for you and the exact amount needed, and you can adjust the strength and amount.

I can not have too much otherwise I get really angry and overstimulated.

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Afternoon entry:

Long party. It's hot outside and I'm sweaty and breaking out. So much talking. This is torture.

I'm trying so hard not to get sunburnt.

My uncle praised me to my dad for being smart and hard working, but that I need to be less negative. I would testify, but end up eating my words.

I told one of my friends happy father's day, he had been a positive figure in my life, and I wanted to credit him for that. I was worried he would find it odd but he seemed quite pleased.

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Evening entry:

We were at the party from 11am-6pm, I couldn't sleep the way home, too uncomfortable.

I changed my clothes and instantly to bed to take a nap, but I had to wake up later to wash my face, I should have done that first because now I have slight acne that is irritating. 

I am quite vain. My skin is usually clear and it was very difficult to get it that way. Now what seems like a minor imperfection feels like the end of the world and I don't wish to go outside and be seen. I cannot wear concealer or foundation other than my eye area because of my skin.

I may be vain, but it only because I did not have the luxury to be for most of my life.

However it is because of this I trust my partner very much because they stayed my friend and remained interest even when my skin and hair was bad before. I trust that they like me as a person even if my face was imperfect.