6.15.24

Fucker, it's all fucked. I have no idea what to do. It breaks al over again, over and over and there isn't anything I can do about it. My friend in particular has become more angry. It's becoming more and more hard to tell if he hates me yet, but it still hope he doesn't. Even if he refuses to talk to me... but there isn't anything to talk about.

I want to be angry at him but I can't allow myself to it. He'll block me again when he's overwhelmed or his view of me will lessen. I don't want to become one of those kids he hates. But I can't base everything off someone elses' vision of me. God.. a few times I thought of myself as spineless. 

I wonder sometimes what would happen if he did find this..?

Oh, I wanted to write a comic ,, and make a game. I already started on the game kind of but making sprites is very time consuming.. I respect all the game devs out there.

I like to listening to harsh music. Not particularly because it calms me down or anything, but because it's able to release a feeling of anger I can't express.

My birthday is coming soon also. June 22nd. I have an idea of what I want but I'm still unsure. The only thing that is 100% is a Simon Henriksson cosplay. Maybe a steamdeck?

Actually, I'm pretty tired. Goodnight