how have i been lately

For starters, i haven't received any bad news in the mail from my music distributors, either that means my video or audio visualizer passed the vevo standards, or they haven't really reviewed it yet. I'm a little nervous because if it does get published and gain millions of traction, hoping it doesn't. That means I'd be the laughing stock, or in another case scenario, it would be seen as mediocre and noone will care, that means I can progress it without shame..

I have written and published a chapter worth 2,000 words of my dumbassery.. featuring Orianna and Oceanus as the main protagonists. My brain is like braining right now, and I've been expanding my vocabulary, and also doing the one scientific technique for storytelling- cause and effect. This happened thats why the other event got affected.

I've been practicing my vocals, and trying to open my mouth wide when I sing. I'm still working on that rage synth melody- does that count as pop or hiphop, I'm not really sure...

I got a high grade on educational psychology and organic chemistry (the laboratory one). I'm not really ready for the phone call to ring. I was picked for like a model or poster girl gig, and I'm kinda scared of that phone call, I've never really modelled before.. also I'm a bad role model..

I am not satisfied with the grade I received in one of my subjects, like what the hell?

My psychosis has worsened, my mental health alongside it has worsened... no further context.. its been really bad.

I threw away some of my clothes, because if I want to be a star, I have to dress like one-

My head hurts right now.. I'm trying to learn how to make a vocal melody that doesn't rely on long notes... I don't want to make another song where the person listening to it thinks that I'm either drunk, half asleep, or something. I just wanna be upbeat, then add riffs, and possibly whistles. Also I've been doing great in making lyrics.. problem, none of it makes sense or fills a narrative, I really should fix that.