diary #19

i would give anything just to have my life back

it's so difficult and so confusing feeling 'nothing' all the time. i feel little to no emotional connection to people or memories, i don't feel scared or sad or happy or angry, i don't feel 'whole', i don't have desire for things like i used to, i feel like im just a consciousness inhabiting a body and not an actual person. i just want my life back. i want to live again. i want to feel desire and fear and sadness and i just want to be able to feel things again i want to feel like a person. no one should have to experience this.