Day 125 of becoming the Weremoth! READER GET READY

Unproductive day! Well, I work better in the evenings so mayhaps I'll get super productive when this entry goes up! I gotta write tomorrow... how terrible...

SINNER GET READY! (TW - abuse but very vaguely)
Tired of indolence!
STUDY UPDATE!
Ascendance of a Bookmoth!
Passion and the hot blooded pursuit thereof!
Recommendations! Hot off the press!

Soooooo, I finally listened to SINNER GET READY by Lingua Ignota. I set aside my entire morning aside for it and OH BOY! It I'd harrowing. I wouldn't say it's as scary as CALIGULA but it is more emotional, more focused than CALIGULA. I made a mistake the last time I mentioned CALIGULA. The album was about other abusers but SINNER GET READY is about Alexis from Daughters. She's so brave for that, honestly. Like CALIGULA and her other albums were brave, being album to confront your past like that but SINNER GET READY is just as brave if not moreso, its emotional, it's raw, it can be scary and at points it is but other times, it just makes me wanna cry. CALIGULA made me shake in my boots, SINNER GET READY made me cry. Listen to SINNER GET READY! Fuck Daughters by the way, don't Listen to them! Well, you can, i know good people who listen and just pirate their music.

I read a poem two years back about these zoo animals who were all lazy and it was comparing lazy zoo animals to this ferocious panther trying to escape. It says something about the animals become tired of their own indolence or tired of their own laziness. That's how I felt today! I did nothing but I was so tired and it often is that way with me. On days when I do a lot and get stuff done, I'm energized until I hit the bed and I fall asleep immediately. I even drank two cups of coffee back to back because I was so tired but it was just my laziness making me tired so now I have heart palpitations for the evening, lovely! I should know myself better than that... damn, there was a lot I didn't get done too, i spent like 3 hours looking for an anime to watch, more on that later though. I did work out though and it all went downhill from there, I wasn't even motivated to work out, it was very reluctant, I was like on my phone watching Anthony fantano while exercising. Weekly track roundup and all that. Also, any music heads wanna tell me what's up with him inviting random tiktokers to do his reviews. But Anthony Fantano! Now that's consistency, one must admire his consistency! I do, I see you, fanty!

Study update! I did nothing! Update over! I did try to study but the work is set out for myself didn't really require much work so I'm good! I think I've got it, I have other priorities which I'll start tomorrow. I could've atleast done a tiny bit of revision buuuutttt nope. I got lazy. I did that thing where I opened my books, closed them again. I was not in the mood. But I did pay for my applications, I need to get in contact with my counselor again, she said for bursaries. You're crazy if you think Im paying full price. I don't think there's any downside to a bursary, you're saying I have my studies paid for and I also get a guaranteed job afterwards. I'm gonna major in English, so gimme the job! I'll talk to her tomorrow, I keep remembering that I have to either before or after business hours and I gotta be profesh. I can't just text her at like midnight like "I finished my applications" no, at midnight, I'm on the castle battlements talking to the ghost of old King Hamlet.

So I spent like 3 hours searching for a good anime to watch because I come to crave a new anime every so often. Once in a blue moon. One anime a year keeps me from turning into a scary werewolf. Weremoth. Me if there were clones of me we're moth. Me if I changed my name and didn't care about proper choice of words were moth. Actually that's right because it would be they were moth but why would i refer to myself in third person...IRRELEVANT! I can't believe this but I do still have a reddit account and decided to scroll through r/anime and then I saw someone recommended Re:Zero so I decided that wasn't the best idea. I just decided to watch Ascendance of a Bookworm. I have not started it yet but that's what tomorrow is for. It seems up my alley kind of. I hate isekai and sometimes I hate anime. I tend to be a cynic when it comes to anime but I'm the opposite with manga for some reason. It's just, there's so much shit out there. Like Re:Zero, it's bad. I didn't even like Konosuba. But I think I'll like Ascendance of a Bookworm because it stars a girl so if anime fans enjoy it, then it can't be bad. There's Cleary some misogyny in the animesphere but I have an exam tomorrow so that story is for another day. She also reads books so I'll enjoy it!

The thing that spurred on thus weird craving to watch anime was a video on Ping Pong the animation which I'll get to. But I've seen so many terrible anime video essays and this was such a breath of fresh air. Also, it's always the videos on my favorites that have the most surface level analysis. Like fucking Hajime no Ippo, there's the old ass Eyepatch wolf video and we love Eyepatch wolf but it's old. Then there's gym bros who don't know what they're writing. When it comes to that stuff.... lemme say I'm the biggest hater! Aside from these blogs, I tend to be very aware of what I'm writing. Anyway the video was by Steak Bently and it was a re-upload of his first video and there's a mildly racist joke in there but nothing too bad or malicious, it's just a tiny bit mean. Other than that, it's such a good video, he's so casual about it while dropping such a good analysis! That got me thinking about passion and love for something. Like debate! It got me to pick up a story I've been working on, I don't think it would work without a visual element so I'd want it to be a comic and it's about an underdog debate team where each of them have completely different motives, the main character wants revenge, the 2nd speaker wants to be smarter for this girl he's interested in and the 3rd is just there for the lols and they develop a genuine love for it. The main character always had a love for it but it became clouded by hatred. I built my writing career out of spite but like even so, my love for writing becomes clouded in different ways and that's really sad. It becomes clouded with doubts. But I love writing! I write right through my doubts because it's so much fun and I'm passionate about it! I haven't written in so long but even when I'm not writing, I have ideas running through my head. I gotta write my story. I gotta start writing on my book. I'm working on that though. I just haven't written anything for it. I don't know if I want it to follow one perspective or many. It's a poetry and short story collection that you kinda piece together but I was thinking one perspective. Anyway, I just wanted to mention that that video made me remember that I needed to write again!

Recommendation of the day! I watched Moonrise Kingdom today and it was a good movie but it reminded me of French Dispatch, another Wes Anderson movie and since we're talking about writing, French Dispatch was one of the things things inspired me to write. I adore this movie. Movie?? But moth, you said it wouldn't be too time consuming. Well, it's an anthology, split into three stories. (The middle one is my favorite) so you can watch it in parts but i highly recommend them all. I wanna rewatch it actually. I think Wes Anderson's movies are great but he uses this shorter form really well. By the way, this isn't underrated or anything, it's just people tend to discredit The French Dispatch and I think it may be one of my favorite movies of his, it's in my top 3. I just love how he plays with the format!

Anyway, that's it for tonight, chat! I need sleep, I'm writing an exam tomorrow! Good night and thank you for reading!