Day 123 of GETTING READY TO LISTEN TO SINNER GET READY

This one's gonna be a good one, I can feel it in my bones, maybe I just feel good today! Today was a good day! Yesterday was a good day too! Tomorrow may be as well!

• First exam!
• READER GET READY! (TW - ABUSE)
• STOMACH GET READY! (I made the same reference twice, ain't it funny?)
• DESK GET- okay I'll stop now
• Discipline, I guess! 
• No quote! 

Moth, why oh, why are you so happy today? What happened to your usual glum demeanor? The exams! That's what happened! I love exam times, I thrive! I go in, go home and then get productive! My schedule finally works! I can fit everything in! I managed to complete all my study work for the day and now I have time for a movie! Life is great! Today was actually my first exam it was this useless subject for life guidance, I didn't study for it either and yet I answered confidently so I think it went well. If it didn't, who cares because universities take out the average when they look at your marks and right now that's the only reason why I'm working right now so why bother. When I got home, I started with math! I did some revision and all that because they're putting work from last year in the test and then they didn't even have time to go over it again so I have to do revision on that. 

Reader, get ready, cause this shits about to get heavy, I just settled all my lawsuits. But, this was actually about something else. LINGUA IGNOTA! I was in art class yesterday and I was looking for an album to listen to, I needed a long one and preferably an angry one so I went to a random ass topster and picked one, I decided to listen to CALIGULA because I've heard the previous two albums by Lingua and she makes Moth-art-class-music essentially just angry stuff so I put it on...guys... my mind is blown... so, my standard for a 5 star album is not high but it's not low but after hearing CALIGULA, my standard is raised to a brand new height, never before explored. So, after hearing it, I hopped into my music server (which I rejoined after realizing how pointless is was to study that useless subject) and I told them how blown away I was by CALIGULA and then they were like...MOTHY GET READY for SINNER GET READY... I have Monday off from school so I'll listen then! Lingua Ignota has always been good, she has a very extensive history in music, like classical stuff, she studied it, she was in another project that we don't talk about and she had the Lingua Ignota handle, now she makes music under Kristin Hayter. I watched an interview with her and Fantano or I'm still busy watching and she's so charming and sweet. Maybe it's just because we don't have sick twisted thoughts but like the things that happened to her are terrible and i found myself wondering why anyone would do such awful things to her. I'll keep it blunt because it's triggering stuff, there's a long word document detailing it but heavy TW for sexual abuse and physical abuse. I watched the interview closest to the release of CALIGULA because I don't want SINNER GET READY spoiled for me and I didn't realize that the interview took place before any of the shit with her previous band, Daughters, came out and like it's really sad actually. Because nobody knew what was happening at that point and watching it from the future is just strange and some of the comments asking for Alexis from Daughters to get interviewed aged so poorly. The audacity of that fuck, Alexis trying to create sympathy for himself before he got exposed. There's no excuse for that shit! That really shows how much music and the Lingua Ignota name probably meant to her at the time, right? Like she wasn't public about it but CALIGULA is clearly about it and it's so overpowering, like her previous two felt like she was in anguish, CALIGULA made her appear so powerful and mighty and she fucking is but I mean, it's a scary album and I love that! In some sense, it feels like in her relationship with Alexis where she had no power, she could find it in the music she made. Also, because I was so drawn into the concept of this album, I decided to start delving into history, Roman history! I love the classical eras. They're so cool and CALIGULA was actually Julius Ceasars nickname so I thought why not? Imagine CALIGULA was Greek history but no, I checked, it's Roman. Also, Lingua looks like my art teacher, that's so freaky. I should've made this a bulletin or something... bulletins are more engaging and also ummm... I typed 600 words about Lingua Ignota and I have more to share but I'll save it. 

You can clearly see the influence CALIGULA had on me. Anyway, my stomach! It's fine, don't worry about it, fellas. I just did a big workout. My friend started gyming so I decided I had to up my game! I don't know why I'm so competitive! FRIEND GET READY! So, I did a killer ab workout, it hurt so much and also, I was a little bit tipsy. I DIDNT THINK WHITE WINE WOULD BE SO STRONG. Or maybe, I can't handle my liquor. I promise I'm a responsible drinker, I just read somewhere that white wine in coffee works so I poured a bit in but it was clear and I don't have good eyesight so maybe a bit was more than a bit... please believe me, I'm a really responsible drinker! This is the 4th drink I've had in my entire life and I won't drink again until the end of the exams. I'm gonna buy myself some of that cream liqueur I love so much and make myself a nice little drink. Anyway, my coffee tasted shit, and it made me feel weird while I was working out. But it still went to plan and im sober! I'm not drunk! I also relapsed, I'm sorry, I had to drink another cup, that white wine one was so shit. 

Alright! What else did I do? While I was listening to the fantano interview with Miss Lingua Ignota, I was cleaning my desk for studying! I usually study at the coffee table in my lounge which is such a good spot because it's the perfect level and has the perfect seating and it's the perfect size but winter is coming and it's right under a window so it gets so cold. I decided to study in my room. The desk was so messy but I got cleaning and cleared it up. I'm not kidding, it looks like the mess you'd find in a cartoon. It's like a pile of stuff. I got to the bottom, it's full of flyers for things that happened months ago! It's clean now though. It feels good to have that space now I need to maintain it which is what I find difficult, I can clean but I cannot maintain a clean spot. 

So, anyway, I'm just gonna write this here as a little notice for myself. Today was good but I don't think every day will be like this so I'm gonna remind myself (and you reader) to be less hard on myself. Like, we can't bring our A game all the damn time, we have bad days and such and days when we're unproductive or days when we can't get stuff done and that's okay, we're human! It's just what we do! I beat myself up a lot in the days leading up to the exams because I wasn't getting the things done that I wanted to but that's fine! Im getting it done now and I'm surviving! Let's gooooooo! Also, stress is the last thing I need, I'm gonna try to be lenient with myself. You're not a fucking dimwit, Moth, I'm sorry for commenting that on my own bulletin! 

I don't have a quote today... I thought maybe I should just change this to a recommendation section or something like that where I recommend something cool and underappreciated too. So today... i wanna recommend stuff that isn't too time consuming or demanding and so... I wanna recommend Astrophysics Miku covers. I recommend Astrophysics other stuff but I love the Miku covers, that's how i found some of my favorite songs, they have miku covers of various odd synth wave songs that you'd never expect miku to be associated with, my absolute favorites have to be the Drive ones (Real Hero and Nightcall), Instant Crush and Bizarre Love triangle, those are also some of my favorite songs outside the covers too. Like, Instant Crush is just so catchy and Bizarre Love Triangle is my feel good song and i found them because of the Miku covers, same with Drive, I found one of my favorite movies through Hatsune Miku covers AND IM PROUD! I wanna relisten to all of them.

Anyway, I've got things to do, movies to watch, a Sopranos season finale to catch and Roman history to research! Good night everyone! Thank you all for reading!