Day 119 of debating Stephen Crowder because i hate his guts

Im thinking of returning to form, perhaps... like I mean I don't wanna be too heavy on self improvement stuff, I actually enjoy writing about my silly, little life instead of improving buuuuuttttttttt I need structure. Also, I have goals or not really goals, more like objectives or tasks which I've set for myself. I have so many of them too. Instead of just cramming them all into my day, I'm gonna try to do atleast 5 every day. Those are...

1. Reading
2. Improving speaking
3. Learn Spanish 
4. Exercise 
5. Cardistry 

Atleast that's what I did yesterday, I do still wanna talk about my life though and other random things that happened. Sometimes, I really have to think, what did I do today? It would be better to get a balance of the two and it will help to put me into the exam mindset... of course, if something isn't interesting to talk about, I won't mention it, I have a separate diary for development which I write all the boring things in...here's the actual headlines though...

• OH DORIAN! 
• Debate bros!
• I FREAKING LOVE MANGOES 
• Green flag + other stuff
• Does your mother know????
• Song of the day (I'll have a quote next time)

Now that Yellowface is done and The Book of Five Rings won't last me all too long, I've picked up A Picture of Dorian Gray again. I thought it would be difficult to get back into again but I must've forgotten how much I love this book. I kinda like that I'm reading it alongside The Book of Five Rings because that is a book about discipline and stoicism and the main message I see people pulling from it is something about not seeking pleasure for the sake of pleasure and then you have Dorian Gray a more hedonistic book about living in the moment and embracing your youth. Allow me to be 100% honest with you all... I don't know where I stand with this... it's such a difficult subject, pleasure or reservation? Which do you choose, is all good in moderation, perhaps? Maybe so, that seems like the best answer but maybe we indulge in some pleasures but steer clear from others, like I don't drink soda but I drink coffee. I'll leave that to someone smarter than me. What do you guys think? Pleasure or reservation? That's another thing, pleasure isn't always a vice, right? I used the example of soda, soda is not a vice, it's just not good for me, there's always the assumption that pleasure is bad. Most of it probably is either bad for you or is considered a vice, is it though? These are the types of questions that run through my head as I read these two books back to back, it's such a lovely double feature, not to mention a short story we read in second languages which also asks these questions. I feel like I'm in debate again! It feels great to have the cogs of my brain turn like so. 

Remember when I said I felt like I was in debate again, my school had this event where these guys put a table out that said "earth is flat, prove me wrong" like this image... by the way, is that Stephen Crowder, fucking hate that guy! Stephen Crowder sucks ass! 

Anyway so he had one of these tables and I was going to go up but I saw how he was debating the others, it was just a lot of screaming over one another. Not really arguing, avoiding all the beauty which the English language holds in exchange for vulgarity! This isn't debate, it's just an argument! He should be glad I didn't come over there, I'd go there with a 3 minute timer on my phone, get three guys for each side, set them up as prop and opp and we'd take turns, it gave me a good idea for my story I'm working on though! Also, another thing, this guy was just playing the fool, whenever someone would say something, he'd spew some pseudoscience. I think listening to it made me dumber, EVERY SINGLE DEBATE I've heard has made me smarter and that's what I love about debate, there's always more to learn and the complexities of it should not be ignored! It's a beautiful sport! I was exaggerating but this actually made me furious, he didn't even consider his opponent's point of view which is shooting himself in the foot there, it's encouraged to do that and it's even encouraged to agree with your opponent on some points to solidify your own. We had a big nihilism debate on whether like has meaning and the prop side said they agreed that life has no INHERENT meaning and then went on to prove how one can give life meaning, that was such a beautiful debate, I have goosebumps thinking about it. But that was... the past... I feel like one of those black and white better call saul cold opens, I haven't actually reached those episodes but it's clear just from the openings that that's Saul and he misses his old life, didn't he say in brba that he'll work as a manager at a Cinnabon. That's me! Who's gonna tell me that im done when they say I'm done! Who's gonna make me do debate again!

This has nothing to do with the fruit... though, it is a top tier fruit, I'm gonna be honest. This mango is a language learning app though, what language are you learning, Moth? You may find yourself asking me, I have a list, a short one but a list nonetheless of languages which I would like to learn. First of all Spanish because that's where I wanna travel and then French because, I don't know, I have a French dictionary that I never use and then Danish because...Hamlet is Danish and maybe Russian or German because I love literature from Russia and because Hamlet goes to a German university (by the way, Hamlet is a period piece kinda and the university that he goes to wasn't wasn't founded at the time when the play was set which I find kinda funny) but knowing me, I'll learn Spanish and French and give up. It's so stupid, the reason why I wanna learn French. I'm not too fond of the French I'll be honest, I never wanted to go...UNTIL! deniz sent me this video of this guy named Luis trying croissants, you have no idea how much that video altered my brain chemistry, i don't think the same after watching that! I feel different, I wanted to go buy croissants because of the video! I never went by the way... me and my sister were both too tired to go... but THIS SATURDAY! So, I've been learning Spanish... that's about it...

I read more Blue Flag and maybe it's not as happy as I thought it was, it ended on a tragedy! I'm not gonna spoil it but I will give a basic summary. Sport festival. That's the summary. I love sport festival arcs though, they're fun and this one especially! I loved this one so much, what a lovely volume! I LOVE THIS MANGA. Also, unrelated but I started learning card tricks again, I'm bad but I try my damndest and I get better the more I practice. 

Oh... I forgot I added that headline... I could've titled it something else but its a reference to Mamma Mia, and whenever anyone says that someone is hot, I associate it with the song Does Your Mother Know from Mamma Mia... you guys have to watch the performance, it did irreparable damage to me as a child, you ever wonder, why does moth love older women? That scene in Mamma Mia is why! 

Here it is

Anyway, why did I make that association? Well something has been bothering me, well not bothering me but like irking me, it's been on my mind, I should rather say. I was walking out of art class and I got into the car and my sister told me that I walked past two girls who were eyeing me and one of them mouthed the words that I was hot. I have many questions and a terrible realization. First, terrible realization, my dad always makes me cut my hair and says that when I do, the girls will be all over me and I got my hair cut three days ago... he was right... some day mullet moth will prove him wrong but for now, let him be right! I need a date for this dance 4 months from now. Atleast, I have another reason to go to art. I can't believe someone thought I was hot! Me! Of all people! Can you believe it??? ME! Anyway, that was a boost to my ego, I have no idea who this mystery girl was but who knows? Maybe im already back in the game. Maybe it's true what they say, once you've been in your first relationship, it gets easier to get into others. Time to rewatch that Leadhead video on love again. It's so good, guys! Watch it...

Here ya go

Anyway, I was gonna drop a quote from this song but the whole song is so beautiful that I just have to drop the whole thing, it's called I Summon You by Spoon and all the lyrics are great, listen to it and LISTEN TO THE LYRICS! That's coming from me! 

Anyway, good night guys, have a great night or day! I told you this wouldn't be edgy! I TOLD YOU and as always, thanks for reading!