# 9; * re:

4/2/2024

still don't know what to title these. maybe i'll treat them like subjects of unsent emails. the recipient list is maxed out but at the same time its completely empty. you'd have to fax your way into my heart instead. i cant stop thinking about this movie i watched last week. i guess it did its job. i've been itching to be inspired and i thought i hit the ground running but then i met a brick wall. its everything and nothing all at once just like you (reader) and me. the bruise on my thigh is kind of cool to look at but it feels wrong to think that way. i'd like to think these words come from the same soul. i went back a couple years earlier and as always it felt like you were speaking my language.* i can feel the hurt lingering even after all this time has passed. a swarm tucked safely within sentences. but thats part of what makes the now so special. the more it confuses them the better— it doesnt matter, it makes sense to those that need it and those who feel it too. youre owed nothing; don't hurt your head by looking too deeply into it. since i met you every time i close my eyes youre there. a hundred letters to a hundred people. a million recipients yet none at all. blink & youll miss it. summer skies & you were definitely better in my head. thanks for that, by the way

*or am i yours?

xoqr