Strawberry

It's almost gonna be a year since I've started working at my current job/hospital and its has been both a blessing and a curse. A blessing because this place has me working from 5am til 1pm (I used to work from 8pm to 7am and it ruined both my mind and body) and a curse because now I have the whoooole rest of the day to do whatever I want. I often times feel so guilty not doing anything and just passing time scrolling online and not doing something "productive". It genuinely makes me sad because I used to spend my days making art or diy-ing things, but I honestly feel like working at a hospital has sucked out all the creativity I once had inside me. I used to be an artist, now I just feel like I'm just another worker. Lately, I've obtained a new habit of buying a bunch of art stuff whenever I go shopping. I've bought canvases, paints, notebooks, markers, pens, embroidery hoops, needles, yarns, threads, brushes, and beads, but it all just sits in my room staring back at me. I don't know if I just have artist's block or if I genuinely lost the ability to create. I'm hoping that writing all the stuff I've been feeling lately will somehow ignite something in me to create again.