the good ol days

One thing that I can never get over is the nostalgia from days long gone. I feel like I'm always doing something to try to avoid it. I just miss how things were so much it hurts and I feel like all I can do about it is run from that feeling. I'm not even exactly sure what it is I miss about it, I think the biggest thing is the innocence and freedom I had when I was a kid. I didn't have any trauma yet or bad life experiences or responsibilities, I hadn't seen war, politics, the dark side of the internet, the dark side of humanity. I think seeing that sticks with you, like it stains your mind, and you can try to wash it out but there will always be a stain. I hope that's not what being an adult is really all about, doing things just to keep busy and not remember. I think I will also always feel sad because the world will always have bad things. It sounds immature and childish to wish everything was just good, that bad things didn't happen, and I'm painfully aware that that will never happen, but is it so wrong to mourn that a little? The tradgedy of the fact that the human experience is to suffer, basically? Maybe it isn't just humans, but every living thing. But birds and octopuses and wolves don't really feel like humans do. They don't necessarily have a conciousness, they probably aren't plagued with nostalgia for their younger days. So what gives??