My life as a young beautiful woman on the ace spectrum.

HAIII!!! 

This post will be rather serious, as you can tell by the way I spell - not using numbers or anything.

A small warning: I wanted to warn you that my blog might contain mentions of s*xual offences & paedophilia.

If you're comfortable with reading further, I encourage you to. You might learn something new or just help me spread the word. If you don't feel comfortable, I totally understand that! In this case, I encourage you to leave or stay cautious, since I don't want to trigger anyone. Still, I believe this topic should be discussed more. You can also save this post for later, when you feel comfortable enough to read it. All kudos, comments and shares are appreciated, I'd really like more people to know how does the life of a "pretty" girl look sometimes.

Anyways, reader discretion advised.

So, people will often think of me as a young beautiful woman. Most people decide to give such people compliments, but there is a line between compliments that are meant to make someone smile and creeping on the person. 

Using pet names and calling someone words like "sexy", or saying you'd like to date them might be uncomfortable, especially if the person you're trying to compliment is much younger than you. Today someone tried to explain himself by the fact that I'm not a minor. That person messaged me on FB Messenger calling me cutie pie, and then admitted he was 37. I told him I was just 18, then he said he is "young at heart". It is okay to be young at heart, as long as you don't send such messages. It's different if it's consensual, but if someone explained to you they don't feel comfortable, don't go like " are u single?" or "do you like older guys?". If I do not consent, I am most likely not into older men and feel uncomfortable. We are talking FB, where my relationship status could literally be found on my profile. You could check it without making me feel uncomfortable. And FB is not a dating app, it's a space for people to express themselves and interact in between each other.

Then the guy went on about how i misunderstood him. But asking whether I like older men and if I am single is a definite sign he's trying to hit on me. A no is a no, but these people just don't seem to understand.

This dude is 37. I am 18. That's 19 years older - he was an adult when I was born. It might not be as bad since I'm an adult, but it's only okay if it's consensual. I also asked him if he would still hit on me if I was like 16-17 and he said he would. That's full on 20 years older. And a 16 or 17-year-old is a minor. Then he proceeded to say that he is not a pedo and was all defensive after I told him I reported his actions to the group he found me in.

So, not only did he sexualise me and objectify me, but also said he would do the same if I was still a child.

Let's move on to SnapChat. I have this one account where currently I'm literally just roleplaying Zim from Invader Zim. And the dudes are all nice and chill until I send a snap with my face visible. Once they realise I am a girl they act like all they need is fapping to me. They keep calling and asking me to "snap" them. They don't do that if they don't know what gender I am.

I've also been sl*t-shamed. Just for generally being pretty. I've been objectified and only added for photos of me or even men asking me for nudes or feet pics. Disgusting.

One thing they never seem to understand is my sexuality. I am demisexual which means I do not experience sexual attraction until a close connection has been formed. I politely explain it to those creeps, yet they still act as if they knew more about my sexuality than I do. Sure, they might know more about sex, but one dude claimed that sexual attraction and orgasm is the same thing and said I was in the wrong because I am asexual so he knows more about sex. Let's make things clear: just being asexual doesn't mean you don't know anything about sexual health and terms used in this topic. Being asexual is not the same as being uneducated. I think these men are the uneducated ones since they cannot understand a word as simple as "no".

"Maybe" doesn't mean "yes". "I'll think about it" doesn't mean "yes". Only "yes" (and synonyms such as "of course" or "sure"!) mean "yes". A "no" is a "no". If I'm telling you not to interact, then please don't. Would you really risk losing your account, job and family, or even your freedom!, for a few pics? 

If someone tells you they won't send you pictures, don't push. Maybe they have trouble opening up. Maybe they're insecure. Or maybe they just don't want to. Leave them alone. Pushing won't make you more likable. Being friendly will most likely make someone like you, but non-consensual flirting won't. The person will just get creeped out.

And just don't be a bigot. Asexual and ace-spec exist and are valid. They are NOT uneducated, undecided nor just shy. This is their sexuality and you have no right to question it.

So, fellows, if someone is creeping on you and you need help or support, I'll be more than happy to help. I can report those people for you and things. Stay safe <3!! Y'all are human, and even if you are not, that doesn't mean it's objectify you.

~ PawlinaPoison ! <3

PS This page isn't really creep filled, no calling out. I'm going to men over the age of 30 to cease from interacting with me on FB (when they get rejected they still message me). Anyways, I'm getting sleepy now. Goodnight!