relaxation

im posting like crazy over on tumblr, so be ready for more things coming up. im also finishing up my digital art and animation course at school, and it has done me numbers with the animation techniques i have to inherit. mostly things that have been on my mind are about art - regarding art - or ideas for art in some way. i have to wrap up two commissions, and my art career is expanding rapidly. i'm getting art requests over on tumblr, i'm getting commissioned left and right, and my animation is better than it's ever been. 

i really think shifting my career path back to what i really want instead of something i think i want has done me good. sometimes i wonder how life wouldve been if i shut up about nursing back when it was the only thing i'd talk about, and focused on the things that actually made me happy. art, friends, music, style, all of that. often i get so blinded by how i need to "start being an adult," or "move on with life already," that i dont realize that i can be happy right here. i have a steady pay, i'm about to get my own car, my room - god, my room is decorated better than it's ever been in my life. my closet is growing, my sketchbooks are being filled to the brim with things i wouldve never thought i'd be able to draw. i have a loving boyfriend, who supports me in everything i do. he takes care of me when im not feeling up for life, and goes to bed with me every night. i have amazing friends, who are supportive and loving, funny and stupid all at the same time. they each have their own interests and styles, and its just amazing to see them grow and thrive. i'm steadily posting on tumblr, youtube, instagram, and here. content i am absolutely loving to make. i'm about to graduate high school... everything is going smoothly. i am just so scared of not being ready for the future when it comes, that i overwork, and get stressed for no reason. 

i guess the point of all of this is to vent, in a way. sometimes, it's okay to take life slow. think about things you hadn't, remember these good times. i take tons of photos, so thank god for that. i can allow myself to forgive, and find peace. i can let myself be okay, and love everyone. i can sleep again.

XOXONBIX