Entry 7 || A Newer "Unpleasant" Dream

My mind feels empty already.

Nothing much has even happened at all. This is only the beginning of the final exams, so how am I already feeling so sluggish?

Hm. I don't wanna be too depressing for this entry.

For documentation purposes, I'll be discussing another dream I just had today. It was an unpleasant one, but since I've had a lot more worse than this, then this one's nothing too extreme for me. Nothing to question my subconscious about.

(But maybe a little.)

My environment was blurry and unclear for the first few seconds. All I could really feel was that I was in a white room with hardwood floors and a yellow lightbulb hanging from the ceiling. I was standing in front of a white door that opened slowly, revealing a man with a grey hoodie holding a gun. He pointed the gun at me for a brief second and chuckled a bit, seemingly amused by the sheer and twisted thought of putting somebody's life in his own hands.

My dream skipped over to me running out of the house as fast as I could. The outside looked like my grandmother's home (and whose home I can't find the right words to properly describe). It was raining, and that's when I suddenly got a flash of my older sister hiding under a table in the house. It was at this point where I realized that I left her in there with the intruder, but being too afraid to go back in, I simply ran farther and farther away.

Suddenly, with the power of dream skipping, I was in a car in the middle of the desert. (I've spent too much time trying to comprehend the natures of dream logic, but if you ever find yourself trying to comprehend it too, I suggest giving up and accepting that it is what it is.)

Anyways, I was sitting in the back of the car. I don't exactly remember who was driving, but what was strange was how small I felt. It was as if I had the body of a 7 year old child, but I was still the same person nonetheless.

I called my mother who barely understood a word I said due to the panic and shakiness I had in my voice. I was trying to her about the intruder that had broken into "our" home and how I left my sister behind. For some reason, I called it a school shooting?

Everything went black, until I realized I just woke up with my face buried on my pillow.

Again, nothing much for me to question at this point. My only question about this dream was why I called it a school shooting.

People say dreams mean something, right? So if anyone could explain any of the dreams I've had, like drowning in a mall, or being told to dig up seven graves, or pulling out my teeth, or watching a daughter blend their mother's corpse into a blender to feed to their father, then I'd be happy to hear your interpretations on it because none of it had ever made any clear sense to me. The only thing I can make any sense out of all this is how batshit crazy my subconsciousness can be.

(And how I've probably got some pent up issues.)