musings

sometimes i feel like my antidepressants just make me empty

you peel away all the layers of self loathing and suicidal ideations only to find that's all there ever was. without the illness, there's just nothing left. no substance, no personality, nothing worth loving at all

i can't understand how people can stand being around me, how someone could actually care about me or how i'm feeling. deep down, what if there is no real me? what if after i make a recovery there's nothing left of me? what if my illness has become such a part of me that once you take it away there's nothing left worth fighting for?

anyways, here's mei's tip of the day. if you ever find yourself lost, confused, or looking for answers, ask yourself what someone else would tell you in that situation. that's what usually helps me anyway

let the stars keep shining ~☆