What happened in my life - Nov 30

Yesterday, before I made this profile, I made a small story or diary thing about how my mother caused my depression. Here it is:

Why is She Doing This?

Made by Landen Fair

November 28, 2023

When I was told from my mother that I’d be at my grandmothers house for 2 weeks, I didn’t agree to what she said so instead of saying I don’t want to stay for 2 weeks and I want to stay for longer, I was silent; I wanted to stay at my grandmothers place for atleast 2 years until my mother can figure out how to get her life toghether and stop thinking about Lilly and the dumb Withcraft shit. While I was inside my moms car, I was nervous to see my grandmother again, but really happy to finally get away from my mentally abusive mother. We met in a Kohl’s parking lot so we can basically switch, my grandmother gets the kids (me and Eliana) and my mother- actually doesn’t get anything. Mason stayed at the place my mother was staying at because she was worried about what might happen to our mother, since she said if she lost us, she would commit suicide.

When I was in my grandmothers car driving in the very familiar and exciting road towards Eugene, she pulled into a drive-thru and gave us some food; the entire time we were in the car she was talking about how much she missed us and how excited she was to finnally get to have us stay at her place, when I was in the car with her I said that I don’t want to go back with her for a very, very long time, she said we could figure something out. When I arrived at the house in Eugene, I was stuffed, but very happy to see the house very clean, everyone chilling in the house, but since uncle Kyle was having one of his schizoprenia waves when he gets aggresive with grandma and other stuff, grandma is used to it now. Since when we got to the house in Eugene, the sun was completely down, so we dibs on where we wanted to sleep, I called the couch, and my sister called the closet inside of my grandmothers room. Since it was also the weekend, we were able to stay up all night, but I fell asleep anyways. I woke up and I was super comfortable, warm, and happy.

Soon I was able to visit Tina and Elisa, I met Aubrey, Wyatt, Connor, Liam, Patrick, Tina, and everyone I loved so much. Tina gave me one of the switches that they appearently never used and Kyle gave me the PS3 and I signed up for a PlayStation account and I made a couple friends online on PlayStation. I never was happier in my entire life, almost the second I stepped into the house, my depression seemed like it just seeped away from my body, everyday I was super excited to meet my family and do lots of fun activites with them.

On November 26, my mother called my grandma and she said she wanted me to go back, my grandmother and Tina said that she would help fight my mother in order to keep me there happy, days of anxiousness, sadness, and endepending doom were fufilling my entire body, I cried the weekend I was suppost to leave for almost the entire night. When the day finally came, I hopped into Tina’s car with Connor sitting next to me, and we drove to the same parking lot we were in. I was super scared, but I felt like my mother wouldn’t say no and she would’ve let me stay with grandma, because being with my mom was basically the dumbest decision she has ever made, my mother started to get really angry at my grandma and Tina. My grandma than told me that I had to go back. I couldn’t stop crying as my mom was trying to calm me down, in which it did not help whatsoever.

Something hit me at that moment, I think it was a huge wave of some kind of mental thing, cause when on the way back to Prineville with my mother, I couldn’t move, couldn’t think, couldn’t speak and I was basically paralized from what had happen, that night when I came to the house, I was crying next to a tree, wondering why the universe would do this to me. Did I commit someting terrible? Did do something wrong? What could I possibly have done to deserve any of this? My mother was bringing my stuff inside and she heard me and told me to shut the fuck up, I cried even harder and harder and I ran away from my mother when she tried to even get near me and say it again. A day goes by and I wasn’t even upset anymore, I was SO FUCKING FURIOUS. I couldn’t believe that my mother all these years who cared about me and my surroundings and what happened to me, turend her back and now I’m typing this in a cold car with the same sweater I wore when I was at my grandmothers house.

I started to call and text my grandmother and my father everyday, since the day I arrived here in Prineville, I contacted CPS, DHS, The serriff’s department, and my grandmother. My grandmother said that if my mother somehow tells the DHS that we lied and they are ok with that, grandma will fight in court and she will have us live with her. If I was a grandfather in which my grandchildren were being harrased by there own mother, I would’ve taken them and made she they had all the support they needed.

Incase I forget the person I talked to on November 28, I have a card of there number, I will send it to my grandma, and my dad and they have to call and tell them that they agree to send me to Eugene, I don’t know about Eliana, but Mason wants to come.

Jeez, why do I even call her mother anymore?

I wish I called her dead.

I wish she was dead.