A Strange and Stubborn Endurance — Book Review

Spoiler warning.

This is my current favorite book of all time. And NO, it's not just because the book colors match my aesthetic. A Strange and Stubborn Endurance was the kind of book that I literally could not put down. Which is sort of ironic, because I went into it without reading the blurb or the trigger warnings, and I spent the first 5 chapters of the book openly clowning on it on my Instagram story before I got sucked in and realized how fascinating it was. It is shocking, and angsty, and honestly? I really like that in a book.

This book is about an arranged marriage being rearranged to accommodate the sudden outing of our main character's sexuality. He's given no warning or choice, and after an assassination attempt, he and his new family scramble to put the remains of their diplomacy back together.

I wish that I had slowed down and taken my time the first time I read this. Because every reread afterward, this book has just gotten better to me. The thing is, the language used can be confusing on the first read. The made up language mixed with the old-timey prose made it sort of frustrating for me to really focus, the first time. And the paragraphs are so long, which is fine! But my eyes were skipping things.

The second the rape scene started, I was locked in. Look, I will admit I'm a sad angsty emo bitch! I like it when characters go through fucked up, relatable things that make my heart physically hurt. This definitely had that. But even better, it had a slow road of Velasin recovering from his trauma, all while learning his worth in a world that finds him inherently valuable.

I am not a sucker for a happy ending. This book, frankly, doesn't have one. Yes, our MCs end up together, but it's after a lot of suffering and death. To me, I appreciate that. This book has "real" stakes, the characters lose things and people that are valuable to them. There is no waving of a magic wand at the end, where a fairy godmother comes and makes everything shiny and happy. These people suffer, and they persist, and they have support.

That was what made this book stand out to me, most. When Velasin needs support, there are people there for him, picking up his cues and cheering him on. Markel saves his life over and over again, Caethari does his best to communicate clearly with Velasin. These feel like real interactions. They feel like real people, reaching out a hand to steady one another, not expecting anything in return.

I would totally agree with some reviews, that the political plot doesn't make complete & total sense if you only read this book once. Not because you have to read it multiple times to understand, but because this book introduces you to so many made up words that can be hard to keep track of at times.

For example, I didn't really grasp the Tithenai words for trans and 3rd gender people very well, until I'd read the book a few times. However, me not immediately recognizing the words didn't detract from my sheer enjoyment of the depictions of trans characters in this book. The explanations are fascinating, so much so that I surmised the author was trans. (I was right.)

I could honestly go on and on about this book forever. The romance is very sweet, it's very slow burn*, and I feel like they have genuine chemistry.

*Ok, this entire book, from their first meeting to the end, is a week. I understand if the canon amount of time makes you uncomfortable, but this is not an "oooh and they're magically deeply in love" kind of romance novel. Velasin has genuine hang-ups about his innate trust of Caethari.

Highlight > Page 142

Was Caethari truly a good man? Or had my own low standards rather served to elevate a simple kindness to the status of an extraordinary one? That he hadn’t raped me— had rather, in fact, expressed horror at the concept— was surely the lowest possible standard to which any partner might reasonably be held.

Note

unlike every other protagonist ever, Vel earns +1 rational self awareness

On top of that, the characters feel like they have dimension and weight to them, if that makes sense. They understand and acknowledge their flaws, they even crack little jokes about it.

Highlight > Page 168

Maybe I can be angry at him for not giving me any legitimate reasons for anger,

Note

Highlight > Page 244

“Name me one thing you’ve done so far that could possibly merit reproach.”
Softly, Cae said, “I forced you to share a bed with me.”
Velasin froze. “That isn’t—that wasn’t your fault, that was me—”
“It doesn’t matter. I knew we were strangers to one another. If I’d stopped to think for even a moment, I would’ve had the staff set you up with your own chambers that first night, not assumed I could rush you into my space.”

Note

i am gobsmacked

Highlight > Page 291

“I hate that you were forced to this,” Caethari said suddenly. I glanced at him, unsettled by the genuine distress in his tone. “I feel as if I’ve stolen you, like some ogre in a story.”
“A handsome ogre, if so,” I said.

Thankfully, Velasin isn't the only character whose given good writing, and Cae's remorse for being less considerate than he should've been left me actually speechless. Cae made genuine mistakes, and he was 100% sincere and regretful when he apologized.

The patience Cae shows Vel is also just remarkable. Vel was raised in a country where being gay, or trans, was illegal. He lived in constant fear of being outed and destroying his family. Moving to a country where homosexuality and being transgender are totally normal is a culture shock that he takes well to. But while he is open-minded, he struggles with his internalized fears.

He has no clue how to act, no clue what's expected of him, and Cae gently reminds him time and time again that Tithena isn't Ralia, and that he doesn't need to apologize for existing.

Highlight > Page 439

“I know. But the way some husbands treat their wives, stringing them along for any little glimpse of affection, or how some wives let their husbands think them forever indifferent—”
“You’re not my wife, Vel, nor am I yours. And,” he added, before I could speak again, “this isn’t Farathel.”

Note

the patience Cae has for Vel is astounding

Highlight > Page 207

“Ah, hello!” he exclaimed, attempting to simultaneously set his khai down and pull his robe closed without getting up, eventually succeeding in both tasks, but not before Cae had learned that Velasin was capable of a dusky flush that extended from cheek to chest. “I, ah—I don’t usually wake so early, but a servant came to take away our dinner things, they brought the khai—”

“Are you apologising? It sounds like you’re apologising, but I can’t for the life of me think why, or about what.”

Note

love this guy. love him so much. he's the only romance novel love interest ever.

Highlight > **IDK what page this one is, sorry**

Velasin gestured tightly. “I mean that you’re not—you’re not damaged.”
“Neither are you.”
“There’s really no need to coddle me.”
“I’m not!” said Cae, uncertain how the conversation had gotten away from him. “Velasin, you might be adrift, you might be hurt and healing, but you’re not damaged.”
“I feel damaged,” he said, softly.

I really enjoyed how Cae fell head over heels in love, first.

I haven't even really touched on Markel's role in the story— mainly because a small part of me wishes we got to see more of him. His character is awesome. But a lot of the book is spent with him wounded, unable to participate in the adventure, or with Vel shutting him out while entranced in his own depression.

Markel, though, is a really fascinating character because he's mute and communicates with Velasin in a sign language they (mostly) created. This really intrigued me! I've never been fluent in any sign language, and I was dreading the idea that this portrayal be blatantly disrespectful, but it genuinely doesn't seem to be. And from the brief excerpt of All The Hidden Paths that the author posted this month, they even address the fact that their made up sign language doesn't fit well with Tithenai, and bring up Markel creating a new signing "alphabet" so that the people of Tithena (like Cae, who immediately jumped to learn the signs when he first met Markel) will be able to sign and understand it better! It's really fascinating how small things like that really create the foundation for why this world feels so real.

Which leads me to the final thing I'll say. This book ends on a pretty abrupt cliff. It's a very "where will their duties force them next?" ending. The next book, All The Hidden Paths, which comes out Dec 5th, 2023, will hopefully be even more about Vel and Cae learning to thrive as a political unit, and will teach us more about Tithena and it's problems— outside of tiernhood. ASASE is mostly local politics, but ATHP seems to really bring country-wide and cross-country politics into the equation, which I'm very excited to see.

Do I think A Strange and Stubborn Endurance is a perfect book? Nope. But it is intriguing, and sweet, and will make your heart feel a thousand different things.

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