The struggles in life.

I really miss my ex friends because they were so fun to hangout with. They would always make me laugh and accept me for who I was, but now it's all just some stupid memory in my mind and knowing that I will never be able to befriend them again honestly makes me tear up. Making new friends is so hard. People judge me for who I am. Boys in my school always call me "gay" or "zesty" because of which gender I am attracted to. (which is obviously guys)

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I just want people to accept me for who I am and respect me. I have a homophobic dad which he is honestly strict. He doesn't allow me to wear pink clothing because it's "girly" and that guys that wear it are weird but I obviously don't agree. I think that anyone can wear whatever they want as long as they're comfortable with but my dad would not agree. I wish I had supportive parents that would dress me up on something that made my dreams come true. I wish I was a girl, they don't get judged for what they are attracted to but when boys are attracted to the same gender, everyone thinks that they're "weird" which I obviously don't agree. I wish people could just accept others no matter what, I wish that people could accept anyone just like how God does.

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I now hangout with other girls in my school because other boys in my school would think I am weird if I hangout with them. (obviously) I don't know how to socialize so I mostly stay quiet when I hangout with the girls that I hangout with, although it's nice to hangout with them, they just aren't the same as other friends that I used to be friends with. If I ever act "girly" in front of my other girl friends, they would remove me from their friend group.

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at the end of the day, I isolate myself from everyone.

Whoever is seeing this, I hope you understand how I feel and I hope you don't judge me.