IRL relationships

I genuinely believe dating my most recent ex ruined me. He's the only person I actually dated in real life, and I think it fucked things up for me forever. I don't think I can ever go back to online dating after it.

I mean, you can't blame me; how am I supposed to feel the things he made me feel with another person online. I just wanna feel loved and all that jazz. I liked the physical aspect of it all; I liked holding hands, I liked kissing, I liked hearing "I love you", I liked cuddling, I liked sleeping in the same bed, I liked being able to smell the person I loved, I liked it all. How am I supposed to get that with someone online? Besides the "I love you" part but that's different when I can't feel your breath on me.

My friend confessed his feelings to me yesterday and while I do like him I had to reject him because I wasn't sure I could get the feeling I'm chasing after through online means. We don't even live that far apart, but still. It all sucks and I hate it.