A Year...

Today makes a year. I've had you most of my life. My earliest memories were with you in what I used to call the old Spongebob house. When things were simpler yet miserable. I was just growing up alongside you. Didn't know the value of life, which makes sense since I was practically a baby. I treated you poorly in those early years which I now greatly regret.

I want to apologize for so much. All that you've seen, felt, and heard feels like my fault. All the bad anyway. I know it's not because I was just a kid but I still hold myself accountable. Thank you for your patience and wisdom. While you're not one to say much, I still knew you would give great advice. Thank you for your comfort. You made this house seem like a home. I could cry in front of you and not feel ashamed. Laugh loudly only for you to look at me but not feel judged. I know you wouldn't lie to me. I appreciated every moment we had together. 

I'm sorry I didn't get to pet you on your last day. I was scared. I cried so much. I just want you back. There's no other cat like you. I've been to pet stores, shelters, and a friend of a friend's house who had many kittens or something, and none are like you. None are calm and cuddly. None feel like home. You were my only constant.

But I had to let you go. You slipped through my fingertips on your way to the vet, only for you to leave flowing through the wind, surrounded by people who don't know how special you are. Just another cat to them.

I love you with all my heart and hope to see you soon, Jackie.