Journal Entry #82: 11/19/23 - Home Again

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I'm home once again, this time for a week.

So, my week went okay. On Monday I went to Cal I SI to get some concepts solidified in my mind. For whatever reason, I can't remember what I did on Tuesday, but on Wednesday I had my lab final. I ended up doing a pretty good job! On Thursday I went to a mental health presentation and also an art gallery. I went with this guy I've been hanging out with. For whatever reason I always seem to befriend guys who do not understand art and are frustrated by its lack of definition. I hope one day to find men who like art like I do. On Friday I just chilled and studied, and on Saturday afternoon I went home.

Everything's been okay, but it's weird returning to my room. This place used to be everything...now it's not. It was only pleasant because I made it that way. Without me, it's just a room, and I haven't been living in it frequently. All the memories are in my head, they will never materialize. November's kind of a bad month for me, and it's worsened by the fact that I have to deal with finals. I haven't been taking care of myself the way my parents would. Although I will spend the majority of my break studying, I hope to have a relaxing one.

There is one good thing about this break I'm looking forward to. I just finalized plans to meet with my old friend. We'll be getting dinner together and catching each other up on our lives. Almost as soon as I texted him, a smile spread across my face. Just like old times. Old habits die hard, right? I will admit I do miss him, even though he is my ex. We were friends first, so I think our friendship is still salvageable. It's been a year and a half since we've broken up. Unfortunately, my thoughts have me feeling anxious. I don't want to say the wrong thing. I don't want to come off too flirty, too cocky, too relaxed, or too uptight. Also, I'm under the assumption that this meeting is platonic. I need to remember that both he and I have changed. I'm nervous but reaching out never hurts. We'll just have to see where this goes.

Oh, also I binged Scott Pilgrim Takes Off yesterday! It was so good and super refreshing to watch. I really wish I had read all the books though, maybe someday...

Anyway, I need to rest. There will be a lot of work to do tomorrow.

Boa noite,

AstraGenesis  ┈━═☆

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