vent about my birth mom

I was born from a mom that didnt want me 

she was the actuall devil and i felt i was put though hell during my stay with her till i was out when i was just ony 13 

its been almost 4 years since that 

and im wondering if i will become her 

will be like her when im older 

because i dont want to 

what if i have some mental issues that cause me not to love 

what if im not fit to have kids in the future due to that 

i wonder if im only here to tempt people of bad and give them all the sins but never truely love and care like i should