Empathy

I don't understand what it's like to listen to someone talk about themselves without perspective-taking. It's just how my brain works. I want to turn it off, how do I turn it off. 

I understand more than ever that it's my fault continuing to become deeply involved with people that emotionally needy and have never had someone to listen to them, as a way to feel like I have some purpose in life and to distract myself from my own problems. This wouldn't be the worst thing if it wasn't always, time and time again, so one-sided. I'm so sick of being envious of other's relationship with me - I never wanna hear "You're such a good listener, I dunno what I'd do without you, my life is so much better with you," - ever again, unless the feeling is mutual. 

And yet. I've boiled myself down to be only a listener - I have no idea what I bring to the table in a friendship anymore besides that. So I just ask questions. It's so easy to be interested in what other people are interested in. The world is a more beautiful place that way, if you can see other's joy and appreciate it for your own. But it leads me down the same path every time. 

Another point in the box for, "Develop a personality."