control

i want freedom

i dont want to be judge

im a slave to everyone,

my own parents dont even let me dress up the same way i want then wonder

why i suddently dont want to talk to them or why i hate them

they control every aspect of my life whilst i cry and scream for help, just anything to make them love me a little and make me get better but all i get is

''oh what problems do you have? you are just spoiled we shouldnt have spoiled you from such a young age. no wonder ur like this''

i just want advice from anyone, i dont want to be fucking told again that i should just ''suck it up'' and ignore everyone

all i do is bottle them up because i know that if i ever spill it out to a another person

they wont care

im only good at serving for other people

i dont expect no one to care about me

i just want control over my own life for once

but i wont

the only control ill ever get is how i end my life

i hope my future attempt works cus if it doesn't

everyone will call me insane.