Why do I do this every time?

I do this every time. I don’t know why I do it, I don’t want to do it, I hate myself for doing it, yet I don’t stop, I continue to hurt the people I love. Every single time I love someone I find a way to hurt them, I don’t know why I do it, I don’t want to do it anymore, how do I stop it? Why can’t I stop it? 

I didn’t want to hurt you, I don’t know why I did. I’m sorry, I know that doesn’t fix it or make things any better but I truly am sorry, I love you, I always will.